How do Mum's who have previously been in a DV relationship cope in day to day lives?
I have been seperated from my child's Father for well over a year and he is not involved in her life (his choice). He was very controlling and emotional abusive to me and I am still in therapy and working on it.
Unfortunately I live in a reasonably small town and am always petrified of running into him. I now live on the opposite side of town and I actively avoid places I think he may be (even if I want to go there). I don't want to move towns as my entire family and support system is here. I am so sick of living in fear. I am terrified to go out to a pub for a drink with friends (or heaven forbid, a date!) In case he is there and he makes a scene. He is unpredictable and a frequent drinker. I have a DVO against him but it doesn't stop him approaching me in the street, especially if my child is with me. What do I do if he just sees us Christmas shopping or something?
Has anyone else been in this situation? What do you do?
1 Replies
I lived in the same small town as my ex and his family and the best thing I did was move away! I didn't have my own family there so it wasn't hard, even if I did I probably still would have moved because as long as I lived there he still had control! Everything I did was getting back to him (usually through his interfering family) then would lecture me about it. Even a largish withdrawal I made at the post office once got back to him because his sister was in the line behind me. What cars were parked at my house. If my kids were late for school. Everything! If you really want your freedom back move away, even just for a little while, long enough for him to move on with his life and create some distance between you.