Please help me with my son!!! I just don’t know what to do anymore! He is 8 years old, grade 3. Just in the last couple of months, he has been really naughty at school. Disrupting the class, not doing his schoolwork, ignoring the teacher, yelling out etc. im getting emails from the teacher basically on a daily basis. Today was the worst day yet. He stole a toy from another student and when the teacher asked for it back, he threw it at her, slammed the door, did the finger, yelled out f#*k off to the class and walked out of the class room. He often takes small things off his classmates but when he gets busted he loses the plot. I tried a reward chart but that only lasted a few days. His teacher did the same. He tells me the school work is not hard for him but maybe it is? I’ve taken privileges off him but that doesn’t work either. Up until now, he was the perfect student. What do I do??? How do I get it to stop?? What are some punishments I can use?? Please help, im struggling!!!
5 Replies
Are there any underlying causes? Would a trip to GP be worthwhile? 8... could be surge of hormones? Stay strong!
If he has gone from a perfect student to that, there’s something going on and you need to find out what. Where has he learnt that kind of behaviour? Is he being bullied? Has anything changed at home? New bedroom where he isn’t sleeping well? New friendship group? Is there an issue with the Teacher? Stay strong mumma and get to the bottom of it. Reward charts, punishments aren’t going to help until you get to the root of the problem. It might take some detective work, but you’ll get there. I wouldn’t blame hormones for such a big change in behaviour, I have an 11 year old, this behaviour is extreme. What’s his relationship like with his dad?
I’d be making an appointment with his GP. It’s time to get a psychologist and peadiatrician involved.
The work may be easy but there is a lot more to school work than the academics and he may be struggling with those other areas.,
Child psych to work out what's going on and how best to handle it.
Meanwhile. Talk to him. Find out what's going on what's is he feeling. What does he struggle with before this behaviour comes out? Why does he do it? Negative emotions, problems with friends, trying to impress friends, hates the teacher, hates the child , hates school, etc etc
Set boundaries and expectations ie) it's ok to have feelings, it is NOT ok to hurt people and break things.
Give alternatives. Ie) going for a walk, taking a timeout sitting at the classroom door or under the desk.
Teach about emotions, recognising how he's feeling, and how to handle it.
Make sure he knows he needs to.learn that because it's not ok to hurt people or break things, and he CAN learn ways to help himself.
Keep communication open with him, daily, and with the teacher about what's going on, ask about strategies and once you get to see a psych they will be able to help with recommendations for school as well and teachers are usually more than happy to work on that.