I have a home visit nurse that visits me once a week and she's done nothing but make me feel bad.
My bub was born with jaundice and has pretty much got over it, but at 6 weeks still has a slight yellow tinge.
Bub has been to the doctor and had a blood and urine test which came back at the higher end of normal.
Because of the jaundice he was sleepy and hard to rouse for feeds (he is breastfed). BUT he had regained his birth weight by 2 weeks and has been gaining since then, has never had a loss. Only he has been averaging 100g a week which has caused my nurse to worry.
This past week has been his most alert and has fed like a champion, thanks to that he gained 200g in just shy of a week! I was thrilled and I thought the nurse would've been too. Instead, she's been telling me.to go to lactation clinics even though I am feeding fine.
I thought that was the end of her until next week, but she's called me this afternoon telling me to make an appointment with my GP to get a referral for a paediatrician because she swears something is wrong! My GP said he was fine and said the jaundice might stick around for a while but not to worry. I told the nurse this but it seems she is the expert, not my doctor.
Should I do as she says? Or trust my GP who I see almost weekly with my baby?
Its making me feel like a useless mum
Is my home visit nurse over the top?
Is my home visit nurse over the top?
Posted in:
Baby & Toddler
16 Replies
I’d just cancel my appointments with her, or ask for a new nurse.
Cancel visits if possible. I have come across some egotistical nurses in my time that think they know better than everyone including the doctors, just cancel or not be home for her last visit.
I'm going to go against the latter. Listen to her. When I had my first born my nurse told me something wasn't right with my Bub and I went to TWO doctors who both said he was fine. By 5 weeks old he was in hospital with pneumonia, and it turns out he had an under developed airway in the left side of his lung. Don't forget this is a woman with experience who works with babies every day.
I agree. As a nurse myself, we spend much more time with our patients than a gp/or any doctor of that matter. It is very unlikely the nurse would be making up what she is saying to upset you. She obviously is worried about something. She has a legal obligation to ensure her patient's safety and wellbeing. Don't dismiss it. No harm in getting an appointment to see a paediatrician.
I disagree (from my personal experience), I was concerned about my son’s development (2nd child) and had a gut instinct that all was not right with him. My health nurse poo poohed my concerns and said that boys always develop slower than girls and to stop being a neurotic mother. Turns out he has autism. My advice would be go see a pediatrician, they are experts. Best of luck 😘
Was he born early?
Yes he was induced a week early
I found lactation consultants and the baby nurses incompetent and fear mongering... And I'm an allied health practitioner so I usually stand up for my colleagues. A paed appointment will take a while to happen so you will have time to cancel if you don't need it.
Yes I have decided to do what she says. I admit he was sleepy and not feeding well because of the jaundice but now he is only slightly yellow and feeding much better, therefore gaining weight. My GP said the jaundice can take a while to disappear. I have previously breastfed 3 children successfully so was feeling a bit upset she would recommend a lactation consultant
I stopped going to my local health nurse, I went once and wasn't feeling it so I took my son to my trusted family GP for his checkups.
This health nurse was borderline obsessive, she left post it notes in mine and my mums mail boxes basically demanding to know why I'd not bought my son in for his checks and inferred she was going to report me.
I guess what I'm saying, if you ever find medical staff or advice questionable, seek a new opinion.
I'm just upset because he had such a good gain this week, only to get a phone call that afternoon telling me to book in asap to my GP to get a paediatrician referral because she is so 'worried' about him. I am constantly being reassured by my very trusted GP that he is fine. Now I am questioning myself and obsessively googling what could be 'wrong' with him
I've been through this exact issue. Listen to your GP. And call her and challenge her. If she's worried about colour, nit pathology results
I would not have her in my home anymore. You need support not criticism and unsolicited “advice”. You are the mum and you know what is best for you and your child. Believe in yourself 💫
I'd listen to her for now, and get a second opinion from a paediatrician not a GP. Someone who specialises in children.
I too would also see a lactation consultant, only as 100g a week to me doesn't sound much. I was told the normal at 6 weeks should be minimum 30g a day so 210g a week. My son was gaining 100g a day minimum for the first 6 weeks (he is a very big boy though) so to me it does sound like a small number.
My son wasn’t doing well weight wise, I ended up bottle feeding (not suggesting you do at all) because we had issues with latching. He was also a little jaundice. Anyway, when I started the bottle, he was putting on 70 to 100 a day, so she may be concerned as that isn’t a large amount of weight gain if your baby hasn’t been consistently putting it on. She also kept saying he would be a different baby when he put weight on, but you know what, he was a drowsy, sleep baby and he never changed even when he got to a good weight. He’s ten now and still a great sleeper and very low key. GPS aren’t great, to be honest, I would listen to her and further investigate. You are NOT a useless mum, this has nothing to do with you.
GP’s aren’t always right. When my daughter was 6 weeks old I was told that everything was fine and she was fine to have needles. I seen 2 doctors in one day and then decided I wasn’t happy with results so I took her to emergency. I finally got a paediatrician in emergency that listened.
My daughters temperature was up and down like a yo-yo between 37 and 41 and arching her back quite a lot. The paediatrician started antibiotics ASAP and gave have a lumber puncture soon after. The next day we got confirmed results she had viral meningitis. Thankfully my daughter is now 15 months and is happy and healthy but requires some check-ups at 2 years of age.
I would see a paediatrician for peace of mind but a mother (and father) knows best. I knew something was wrong with my baby and I done everything I could to get help, trust your gut.