My now ex has become a crackhead( it's the reason we have broken up)we have a 5 & 2 year olds and he has chosen to sign his rights away and have nothing to Doc with them rather then get his shit together, my question is how do I tell the kids daddy doesn't want to be in their lives anymore or should tell them he has died and let them cherish their memories of him
7 Replies
Don’t tell them he has died! Personally, I’d tell them that daddy is sick and therefore can’t be around - if you’re as honest as me, dad is sick in the head and can’t come over or talk anymore. If they ask if he will get better say no. Don’t let them think he may come back one day :)
Oh geez dont tell them he died! Tell them hes sick and he cant take care of himself and he cant be a good daddy at the moment and put their minds at ease by saying hes off getting help but dont promise that he will get better and come back. You can say that him and you dont live in the same house anymore and that you wont again.
You tell them that daddy is having trouble looking after himself. Until he can look after himself he can't look after children.
This is perfect
I'd tell them the truth.
'Daddy loves you very much, but daddy's sick so he can't be around'
Keep it simple, they're still probably a bit young to come to grips with it yet, but you can expand on it as they get older.
Don't go down the 'dead' route, that'll be more phsycologicaly damaging than an absent father.
I just want to add, be careful what language you use (remember this is for the kids benefits not his).
Try not to use words like "he doesn't want to be here" or try not to talk about how he prioritized drugs over them because this may make them feel as though they aren't worthy or as if it's their fault.
Truthfully, he is a very sick man, I think it's important for them to know that.
Nooo! Do not lie!
Keep it simple "daddy has some problems and needs to go away for a long time."