Why can we never just be happy with being just us?
I feel like it's a constant battle to look good, feel good and be good.
I thought it would get better with age, but it doesn't!
I feel like I always have this expectation to live up too, but never quite get there.
I feel like I'll never be 'happy' with myself, does anyone else feel like this?
If you don't, what's your secret?!?!
I wish I could just find myself, I don't even know who I am or if I ever will.
Who am I?
Who am I?
Posted in:
Self Care
6 Replies
Hi lovely mumma, I think you need some professional help such as a psychologist. Go have a chat to your GP about your feelings and they can advise :)
I can relate. I remember in my 20's thinking "when Im 35 I wont care that much about weight, etc..". Im 35 now and I still care about my weight lol.
There's like 3 ladies in their 50's at work, they are always talking about the extra kilos they want to lose. I thought by that age I wouldnt care but seeing them makes me realise I'll always care.
I feel happy just being me. It was hard work getting there and I had to make some firm decisions and follow through on them.
Firstly I made a decision to unfollow certain social media pages etc. So no wellness gurus, coaches, diet industry, lifestyle pages, and how to have the perfect whatever pages. They all have a product to sell and what they sell is never realistic, based on real life etc. I actually pretty much logged out of everything around beauty, there will always be another new, made up waste of money trend etc.
Not seeing that stuff around me immediately made me feel so much better. I suddenly stopped seeing messages that my eyelashes were not long enough, my hair wasn't perfect, or my man would dump me because I wasn't completely hairless 100% of the time.
I went to see my GP and had an honest discussion about my health. Am I healthy? Do I need to make some dietary changes to be healthier or am I all good? If I'm all good then that's something to be happy about, because a lot of people don't have that. If I need to make some dietary changes I'll follow an actual dieticians advice or my doctors advice, not someone on the Internet, because the messages they sell are not neccesarily accurate and are skewed to sell you more products.
I then looked at my achievements. I started taking time to be grateful for what I had. We have food over our heads, a child I love, we are safe, we are very privileged to live where we do. It didn't take long for me to stop looking at what I didn't have and be so very happy with what we do.
When I find myself wanting things, or setting goals I sit down and ask myself some questions. 1. How will this change my life in good and bad ways, 2. Do I need it, 3. Do I actually want/need it or do I feel it will help me 'keep up' or fix something within me.
This is really great advice 🌸
I am content.
I do not have a care in the world about what 'other people' think of me. Their opinion does not matter, only mine does! I am loved by my children and husband regardless of what im wearing or if i have make up on.
Happiness is not a destination, it is a journey.
Just choose to be happy with what you have, rather than what you wish you had. Appreciate the small things in life and not the material things
My secret is to accepting life as it is. Not saying to accept your weight issues/physical appearance or shitty job ect. But accept that life is never "PERFECT" and that there will always be room for improvement in most aspects of life, and that's what it's all about. Focusing on the positive things, yeah I'm not the most out-going person and I am actually really shit at striking a conversation but hey, I am good other things; I'm a great mum and fiancé. Maybe I'll aim to strike up a good conversation with the lady in the supermarket tomorrow that's always trying to be friendly yet I have continued to fob off.
I think we always define "happiness" with perfectionism... and that's just not possible. Every aspect of your life couldn't possibly be perfect all at the same time. Instead, I see "happiness" as ACCPETING... accepting life, as is. Working on what you can, when you can and focusing your mind set on the good things whenever you do feel your mind wondering off into the too hard basket.
I probably sound like a looney. But this is my mind set