I have 2 children (7 and 4). I have always wanted a big family, but my husband has only ever wanted 2. I turned 32 this year, and had come to accept the fact that I wouldn't be having anymore babies. I have been offered fulltime work next year when my youngest starts school. I am super excited about it. I have been a SAHM since our 7 year old was born, so I'm keen to get back to work. Work is hard to find where we live, so to be offered fulltime work 7-8 months in advance is amazing.
Anyway...... I have unexpectedly fallen pregnant and I'm freaking out. I'm due on Valentine's Day and my youngest will be about 6 weeks off turning 5. I highly doubt that I'll be able to ask my future employer to hold my position for me while I have some time with the new baby. I was so excited and over the moon when I fell pregnant with our 2 children and I could barely contain my excitement. This time though I'm panicking, scared, worried and I know this sounds horrible, but I think I actually feel a little disappointed. I was really looking forward to starting work. We had trouble falling pregnant with our children and this one happened so unexpectedly. I am a huge believer in things happening for a reason, so this baby is obviously meant to be with us and It will be loved unconditionally.
I really have no idea what I'm asking. I guess I'm just hoping that these feeling will pass. I have horrible morning (24 hour) sickness which is making life quite difficult at the moment. We haven't told anyone yet, so I don't have anyone to talk to about how I'm feeling right now. My husband is surprisingly ok with this pregnancy. Considering he has always been completely against having another baby, he seems to be excited. We're only a little over 6 weeks and he has already started thinking of names and looking at baby things like prams etc. We got rid of all of our baby things because we weren't going to have anymore babies.
I'm sorry for the long post. I really needed to get my feelings off my chest. I really need someone to assure me that everything is going to be ok.
2 Replies
What you are feeling is totally common! It's how I felt when I found out I was surprise pregnant. I had plans, that didn't involve babies at that time. I had opportunities that I had to put aside etc. all totally valid feelings.
It has absolutely no bearing on how much you will love this child. It's just your brain has to do a big adjustment, you were going down one path and suddenly you are on a different path.
Just remember there is always options like daycare for the baby, you can still work if that's what your heart desires!
Congratulations, all the best