I'm 20 wks pregnant and know I have ages to organize but I mentioned to my partner today about needing to get someone on call for when I go into labour to watch our 2 yr old
He suggested his parents who live 4 hrs away which is fine but I was overdue last pregnancy and would rather my MIL be here when new baby is here not using her holidays before hand
Then he said oh well we will just have to take our 2 yr old with us
I don't want this as I don't want to be waking her up at midnight and for her to be waiting around at hospital (to full on)
Has anyone else had to take there kids to labour? How was it? How can I explain to partner that it's not the best idea?
Bringing 2 yr old to labour ward
Bringing 2 yr old to labour ward
Posted in:
Pregnancy, Baby & Toddler
6 Replies
Could you look into a local baby sitter that may be flexible to this situation? I can definitely understand why you'd rather not have to bring your toddler to hospital with you, not really practical or fair on her. I'd definitely try to find an alternative!
In the hospital I gave birth in, you could only have 2 support people present and anyone else weren't even allowed to wait in the maternity ward, they had to wait down stairs.
Just tell hubby it will be too hard for him to support you and race around after a toddler.
Firstly I'd explain that there will absolutely nowhere for your child to play, sleep or eat etc. that there most likely will be dangerous medical equipment which is totally unsafe for a toddler to be around.
Secondly you will most likely be in pain and your toddler will have no way of really understanding what that is about and it would be emotionally scarring for her.
Thirdly you BOTH need to be able to focus on what is happening, neither of you will be able to watch her, comfort her, keep her safe.
Fourth, if the shit hits the fan, intervention is required your toddler might have to see a brutal episiotomy or you might have to undergo a c-section unsupported because you won't be able to take a toddler into surgery and there will be nobody to look after a toddler.
Fifth as a doctor/nurse/midwife I would be furious that a family put you and your babies life at risk by bringing a toddler. Toddlers are distracting, unpredictable and get into everything. A medical professional needs to be focusing on you and your delivery of a baby, not worrying if the toddler is in the way, not distracted by a toddler etc.
I'd look at finding a babysitter you've got plenty of time to have a few trial runs etc before the day to find one you liked. You could even find a couple you like by then.
Even when you take older children into delivery they advise you have an adult dedicated to that child so the child can be removed if they become distressed etc.
Not all hospitals allow kids in the labour ward so I'd be checking with the hospital first and if they don't, I'd be getting them to tell your hubby that.
Do you have any friends nearby who would be able to take your toddler when you go? Surely there's someone nearer?
If there is no one else, ask your mother in-law ahead of time. If she has plenty of notice I'm sure she won't mind at all. Or do you have a friend that can take bub and bring her back once baby has arrived ? Good luck either way
Yes I did it was fine. The difference is its what I wanted. They were up at midnight, it was a really special time though, and then they slept on the bed in the ward and the chair and the next day at home which worked out for tired dad for them to all be on the same clock.
You explain it to your partner by saying that youre giving birth so its your choice who is there and you want him to be your support person. If something goes wrong, even as small as a tired tantrum, he cant support you with a two year old to look after.
Your choices are either get another support person for you there as well, get another support person for the child there as well, or get child care. Have you thought about hiring a doula for you and then your husband can be there but also with the toddler?