Hi lovely IMs.
I am seeking the advise from those of you who have been through the same experience. My 4yr old son is having a few difficulties at daycare since he has been going to another pre-prep. He has been at his daycare since he was 2 and he used to love it and all the educators. He had a few issues every time he transitioned to a new room but generally pretty good. He is a very clever little boy with a vivid imagination and excellent language skills. He is also very tall for his age. Being an August baby he is not due to start prep until next year. Early last year he transitioned up into the preschool room at daycare so he has been in that room most of last year and is still there now. At the time he was the youngest but now, all of his classmates have since moved on to prep this year with the majority of the younger group moving up to the preschool room with him. Now he is nearly the oldest.
Because he needs stimulation and to be challenged, I enrolled him in a c&k pre-prep kindy where he goes for a 5 day fortnight. Because my husband and I work, he attends his old daycare on the alternating days - 2 days one week and 1 day the other week.
He absolutely adores the new pre-prep and his teachers. I know it's all new and exciting, but he fitted in beautifully from the start and has just thrived. The problem has been when he attends his old daycare. He has been increasingly lashing out physically and verbally so much so that today the teacher called me about his behaviour and two incident reports where he hurt other children. She can't find a trigger, it just seems to be constant hurting or breaking. Pushing, punching, slapping and throwing things at other kids, kicking at the teachers, knocking over kid's games, not joining in mat time, refusing lunch, swearing, attempting to break furniture and tip tables. This is just so unlike him and the daycare teachers are at a loss. I know he physically lashes out when he is angry but he is rarely angry. He's usually a very chill kid. He is the total opposite at pre-prep. He has been telling the daycare teachers that he likes the other kindy better. I know he has a much more experienced teacher at the pre-prep but he has previously been very happy at daycare.
I personally think he is bored and is showing his anger at frustration at having no control over the situation. He can't tell me what is wrong because I don't think he can really explain himself. We have decided to increase his external activities a little and increase our quality time with him but I am struggling with other ideas to make this situation better for everyone. I am yet to speak to the pre-prep teacher, but I will. I know it's only been 3 weeks since the change but this escalation of violence is just not on.
Sorry for the massive post. Just FYI, I work very closely with special needs children and I can guarantee that he is very neurotypical.
Thanks for your help and experiences!
3 Replies
Does he actually understand that he can't go to the pre-prep program full time? That it actually isn't an option?
I'd also make an effort to find out what activities they are providing at pre-prep that he loves so daycare can provide those activities for him.
I think he doesnt like it so hes lashing out. Hes not stimulated and possibly thinks hes too clever for what the teachers are telling him etc. Can you put him in kindy more days?
Having said that a four year old should be able to play with 2-4 year olds a few days a week, free play is very important, but thats different to being bored in a toddler class and being spoken to and have to do everything at a 2 year olds pace. I guess im thinking theure trying to fit him into one of their categories and he doesnt fit anymore.
Sounds like he is bored at daycare. Speak to kindy and find out what he likes to do there, then mention those activities to daycare. The daycare teachers should be able to see that he is bored and provide activities that will extend his skills and knowledge while still being appropriate for the other kids who are at a lower ability level.