My kindergarten aged child does not want to go to school, he tells me he is frighten and that it is too long till I come and pick him up....he absolutely devestated.
He know the school so well he has a big brother who goes there and we attended all playgroups and pre kinder there...
He is a very smart and determined boy.
Any suggestions so I do not have the tears that pull so much on heart strings.
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7 Replies
You tell him it isn't too long and he will have a lovely time with his friends. Mummy will be doing long boring jobs that will bore him and he won't like, there will be no time to play etc because boring jobs.
Tell him The teacher will let you know if it is too long.
Ask him what hes frightened about. If hes not turning six and you can keep him home consider giving him some more time at home. 5 days a week at big school is really different to daycare or being home. If hes scared there its very likely hes not getting the one on one help to get through it, unless you can figure out what it is and speak up for him.
Kindergarten here is 3 days a week and he is not 5 yrs old yet.... He has never been away from me but yet he is a very determined confident boy in everything else he does.
Oh right, in that case I would keep at it but start with shorter days while you have the flexibility. Try a 3 hour day, it will fly by, then a 4 hour day, and i think soon he will want to stay with the kids rather than go home.
Little hard to start with short day, as they go to get use to school, so 8:55-2:45 and to do that would disturb the class.
He know the school very well he has a big brother who attends there.
I might just have to be cruel to be kind
Thank you so much for your help.
No you don't! If he's not ready and is feeling genuinely fearful, you could create a negative association around school.
Talk to the teacher, see what suggestions they offer, or better still, the school counsellor for some strategies.
My sons have autism and at times we have modified their attendance. What if you picked him up at lunch time, that way it's not disturbing the class? Talk to him about it, see if there's something he'd like to take to school to remind him of you, like a teddy or hanky with your perfume on it.
You might need to do an even shorter day to start, and then add on an hour to his day each week.
Shoving him in too early won't help him to get used to it. He needs to know mum is the one person in the world he can trust and rely on. Good luck!
Completely agree, hes so so young. children take the next step of independence naturally when they feel supported, expecting too much and removing their supports too fast too soon is what causes anxiety.