Hello IM's,
I'm really at a loss with my 14 year old daughter but don't know where to start.
Miss 14 is the youngest of my 3 girls, the others are 22 & 16. M has always been such an outgoing girl who was always willing to give anything a go. Dancing since she was 5yo, playing sport and always making friends wherever we went.
But when it came to school, she never enjoyed it, so much, that after her 1st week at prep she came home and said it wasn't for her. I thought this would pass, but we are in year 8 now and every other day has been a struggle.
Since starting high school in 2014 everything just went down hill, she gravitated to the cool crowd and has really gone out of her way to show disrespect, no interest and disrupting every class.
We are now in her 3rd high school in 2 years, and 4 weeks into the new school, & very teacher has called me about her bad attitude and behaviour.
Saying this Miss 14,at home is a great kid, shes always been active, helpful and full of light. I understand that the school system isn't for everyone and I'm not blaming teachers.
I'm just hoping for a little advise on whether home schooling or other avenues would help her to strive and not break the beautiful soul she has.
4 Replies
I dont really know but have you spoken to the school about it being not for her. I think you need to Understand that more to help her. School should be ble to support her needs and offer strategies, doing her work in a quieter room etc.
I would also consider home schooling. I didnt enjoy high school i wouldnt push her through that experience its a waste of everyones time. I hope you find a suitable solution.
Meanwhile i would also be working on her esteem. Finding her strengths and hobbies she enjoys and things she excels in.
How are her grades? Is it possible she struggles in some areas which is making her act out? Could she possibly be on the spectrum? This stuff presents very differently in girls and it can be exceedingly frustrating for students who don't fit the mould.
I would look into psychologist for her, see if you can get to the bottom of it. Ask the school for support, and maybe consider home schooling for her for now. No use forcing a square peg into a round hole.
Hello, yes her grades aren't good & never have been have been, but my husband & I have never expected her to be an A or B student we more focus on attitude & effort. We've seen a pedistrician & they diagnosed her with slight ADHD & she went on Ritlan for 2months & said there was no effect, so we stopped giving it to her, as giving her drugs for no result didn't sit well with us.
I definitely feel her lack of effort & acting out is due to her not understanding the work load.
I think seeing a psychologist may be our next step to try & get her to open up.
She's very quick to pick up dancing, sport & even her new part time job, but when it comes to school her walls go up.
I'm with you that you can for a square peg into a round hole. Thank you for your feedback. We love her dearly & know this is a tender age & don't want to push to hard & have her not have trust in us as loveing parents.
I would explore other avenues, but not home schooling!
I have home schooled and it's seriously a lot of hard work and if she is avoidant of school work then it will just go to sh*t.
What does she want to be when she leaves school? What are her interests??also talk to the school coubsellor about options.
Is if that academically she struggles and needs extra support? Undiagnosed dyslexia?? Go back over everything? Why is she changing high schools? Are you moving as a family or is it her behaviour?