I’m looking for advice. This will be a long one.

I have two older sisters and a brother. All of us now have children; one of my two has autism (the older boy, my other is a girl).
Thing is.... my sisters, let’s say F and N for identifying purposes (with F living in one town over and N hours away), treat me and my partner like absolute crap they found on the bottom of their shoe.

“You’re a mess”, “you need to do this with ____” from N who has special needs training but doesn’t live with one herself and deals mainly with girls, they berated us to come out to our mums one weekend despite knowing it would cause a meltdown from my boy... then proceeded to ignore and interrupt both of us all evening so even the N’s eldest was insulted on my behalf, they berate our hobbies and likes/dislikes just because we’re geeks (of the watching scifi + fantasy tv/movies, gaming variety and they’re cowgirls who ‘watch reality TV play candy crush and are normal’, their words), I once told them I was suicidal and neither of them contacted me in any form for two weeks (not that I get any calls/txts from them unless they want something and they’re always too busy to talk when I call so I’ve kinda given up) my best friend did more to make sure I didn’t go through with it and she was in a city 6 hours away attending UNI. For my wedding that was geek themed (which they weren’t impressed at) each of my bridesmaids got a geek purse to go with their dresses... F gave hers back to me despite it was a gift, said she’d never have an occasion to go with it, coz you know she wears all the bridesmaids gifts she’s gotten over the years from other people.... They always, ALWAYS, tag each other in 'best sister in the world' posts, like I don’t even exist, N always plans ‘sister days’ with F and N’s sister in law and I'm not even told until FB posts about it. The looks of scorn I get for wearing a geeky tee or showing my older nieces a new board game (like Settlers of Catan, or Quirkle) could kill. They won’t ever even entertain the thought of playing a game with me, not even cards against humanity, because ‘we’re not geeks’. They trash talk my friends (“so ___ is Bi? That must mean she’ll go with anybody”). I have to talk in a monotone around them because every word I say can and will be interpreted as hostile in nature, which I am hit on the arm for by F with a death glare even if there was literally no hostile intent within my speech they just decided to hear it. I can say thank you a million times, offer my services to help, give money when I can... and I’m an 'ungrateful lil b***h'. They used to, before I caught on to what was happening, manipulate me into being angry at my Hubby for something that I wasn’t even actually angry about, they’d just subtly gee me up over an issue they had, not me, and I’d go home p****d off... N would come over, stay at our mums, visit F and then seemed to forget me, or my brother, exist and go home. The anxiety I sometimes get when I see their names on my phone, on the rare occasions they call me, is nauseating. Nothing I ever do is good enough... If I could pilot a shuttle single-handed to the moon, they'd probably mock me for being a nerd.

It’s gotten to the point that dealing with them makes me so depressed that I want to literally cut all ties off with both of them, F more than N but where one goes the other follows. By cut ties I mean delete off FB, block their number, not allowing them into my home, telling my FB friends and my mother that they are not allowed to share details about my life with them and 'if they cant abide by my rules to delete yourself now' and ignoring their existence outside of family functions and probably then too. The only reason I haven’t done so is I love my nieces (no nephews), and they don’t treat my kids badly, outside of telling me what to do with them. Even our mum said I need to do what I need to do and she’d support me but... I’ve spent so much time trying to bond with them; suggesting games they’d like if they’d just give it a chance, watching reality shows that I hate, suggesting outings they’d like but I wouldn’t because I just wanted to have a sisterly bond with them.... and I don’t want to throw that away but I'm so exhausted dealing with them.

I just don't know what else to do.

p.s
Don’t just say talk to a councillor, I'm trying, I live in a small rural community where the free psychologists are booked out for at least 18 months and I can’t afford private without the 12 free scheme that my doctor needs to sign but doesn’t believe I need (as I'm not suicidal anymore), and it can take weeks just to see him.