Hi all,
My ex and I have an 18 month old daughter together. We have a great relationship; 50/50, $0 child support, open communications etc. Our philosophy is "our child has 2 homes but 1 family", so we do our best to co-parent.
Now I've always wanted more kids, and I know he did too as it was something we discussed while together. As we're no longer together, I had still mentioned to him that I'd love to fall pregnant and have a bub in the next year. (Daughter will be around 2 1/2 yo so I thought nice age gap between kids). We had a brief discussion about if he (my ex), would be willing to be (for lack of a better word), the sperm donor. (I'll note at the time he had made the joke that we do it old school and have sex). I thought it'd be nice for my children to share the same father, and he's an amazing one and I couldn't fault him in his parenting even if I tried.
I guess my question is, has anyone been through this? And what are your thoughts on having a child with your ex? Any feedback or advice would be much appreciated xx
4 Replies
Im just going to wonder why, if neither have moved on, working well together, wantbto sleep together and have a baby, why not reconcile.
Having a baby with ex will mean youre busy with a baby again for another year and a half minimum. And then what? Then to looking at moving on with your life? Meeting a partner? Youre little one will be older. Your time more stretched.
Yes ive done it and i dont think its the healthiest route. Get on with moving forward.
Yeah seems strange to me! I couldn't imagine having a baby with my ex.
While things are all rosy now, what happens when he gets a girlfriend who is a bit nasty?
If I've broken up with my ex I really don't want to have sex with the guy.
Got to wonder why you aren't together if things are so perfect that you'd want more kids with him.
My aunty did this and she regrets it immensely.
I have a child to my ex and one to my current partner and I am so glad my youngest isn't to my ex as well.
My advice would be not to do it unless you plan on getting back together. There is nothing wrong with having kids to different fathers. My girls may not have the same dad but they are incredibly close, a lot closer than a lot of other kids I know who do have the same dad.
Hmm it's a bit of a strange concept but I guess it really is no different to getting a sperm donor except you know the father and he will be part of your child's life. I am also a little confused as to why you guys are not together if everything is great and you even would have another child with him! But then again some people just are not romantically compatible but do great as friends. Anyway, I'd say if it's right for you then go for it! It's like everything else in life, we do what's best for us. This decision will impact noone's life except yours, your daughters and your ex's so really it's those people who need to be considered and who's opinion counts!