I'd like to hear some opinions on having just one child. After 2 years of heartbreaking fertility treatment, a tough pregnancy and an induction turned emergency c-section I said straight away I wasn't keen for round 2. Initially hubby insisted he wanted 2 babies but as our daughter got older he has realised (even though we love and treasure her) kids are hard work and expensive. Our daughter is 1 and a half and he now seems quite certain one is enough and is considering the snip. We are still young. Will we regret it?
11 Replies
I never regretted having my tubes tied after one child. One is the right number for me. But who can really say what hubby might feel
No one can say whether you will regret it or not.
However I do know someone who wishes she had gotten her tubes down after 1 child instead of having more. The saying "You only regret the kids you don't have" is definitely NOT true for everyone.
So it is really just up to you and your hubby. Don't let anyone guilt you either way.
So very true!
Sit on the idea for 6mths if you still feel that way 6mths later then book in. Thats what myself and hubby did and he happily had the snip 2yrs ago. We have never regretted it and are happy with the childen we have.
There is no way to tell unfortunetly. With these sorts of operations some regret it and some don't. Only you and your husband can make that choice BUT if there is at doubt at all maybe try another form of birth control for a year and then if you are both still sure then revisit it :-)
That age is a difficult age. It's normal to be all "no way! No more!" But a vasectomy is serious and you may regret it.
You say you're young but how young? Because almost all doctors won't do a vasectomy until the man is 30 years old.
This is very presumptuous of me but you said you had trouble falling pregnant so is a vasectomy absolutely necessary? Can you just use other methods presuming it's unlikely to fail knowing you had trouble the first time? Sorry if that sounds rude, I just know my mum had tubes tied at 30 after FOUR kids and she still regrets it!
I had a very similar experience to you first time round, we thought we were done with 1. 8 years later out of nowhere u got really clucky and convinced husband to go again. This time I had an elective c-section and it was a completely different experience. So much so, we now have 4 kids.
If anyone asked me 5 years ago, it was a definite no, I was adamant. So things can change and we had considered a permanent contraception at the time but I am so relieved we waited. Good Luck
My husband and i decided to get the snip after our 3rd was born. I am 28 and always said during the pregnancy and straight after no more, 6 mths on and we both regret it alot we wish we could have 1 more. We will save up and probably try to get it reversed or ivf, but my advice would be dont go something permanent after only 1 unless you are 100% sure because it sucks knowing that you can't have anymore.
My husband had a vasectomy recently. We are 32, we have one child. We decided we were done and sat on it for a bit (about 12 months) and we have zero regret. My son is 5. He's perfect. We are happy. I was sure I wanted another when our son was born, I had an easy pregnancy, easy labour, he's an easy kid, but I am happy for him to be our one and only. If I die my husband is positive he doesn't want to have another with someone else. That's our story but no two are the same.
Our third pregnancy resulted in twins. I now have 4 under 4. We do not want more children. Hubby has been for the initial consult. But it all seems so final. Yesterday I had the mirena put in. That way we have five years to be certain a vasectomy is right for us.
My suggestion if you are young is wait . I was 'sure' I'd not want another one after having two (fertility issues , horrible horrible pregnancies and rough birthd ) and even told hubby to book it in when ds2 was 1.5 yo too. but when ds2 turned two I started getting clucky again and we played with the idea of another . We were still talking about whether we should or not, because pregnancy would be hard , when we got our surprise number 3! She's perfect and I would not change her for anything ! We are both now certain we are finished having babies so he's now has the procedure but we are mid 30s so not what I'd call 'young' as such .....
As others have said wait it out a bit longer , use other contraception methods for a while (but DO because after having one baby your fertility issues can disappear ! Happened to me! ;) )
All the best though !! Xo