So just a query I guess before I actually make a phone, but my ex has cutoff of our 11 year old son. I pay $95 a week child support. Every school holiday I have him for 7 nights. I'm struggling these weeks with working less shifts feeding him and trying to do fun things as well as paying his dad money for child support for that week when he doesn't have the child to support. I do. I know it may sound petty and I don't mean it to. Just wanting some opinions.
Thanks :)
12 Replies
Yeah it sounds petty. I have my son full time (dad did a runner) and that's what it's like all the time, especially around school holidays. As long as the child support assessment correctly reflects how much you have your son, spread out over the entire year then I'd suck it up.
You aren't paying dad for the week you have your child, you are paying for the time he has your son but they spread your payments out over the entire year to make it easier to manage.
Ask CSA if you can make your payments at $105 per week. It should cover your total in 47 weeks instead of 52 meaning each of those 4 weeks you have him (and maybe the 5th week could be November so you have some extra $$ for Christmas?) you won't need to pay. Won't know if you don't ask.
Sorry to say but this is some single parents and even partnered lives day in, day out, struggling to put food on the table. Yeah you suck it up and do things that don't cost money, like museums, park, picnics, libraries, towel cubby houses in the lounge room, movie nights at home, gardening, buying home brand foods and cooking from scratch. You are not paying him when he isn't caring for your son, that is the annual amount divided by 52 weeks, as the above said, pay more during the year and don't pay when you have him.
Agree with this. My kids dad is broke and he struggles to afford them when he does, cant even afford the train ticket. But thats nothing on the ongoing expense and pressure i have to keep a roof over their head, run a family home and provide a good life for them. Those expenses dont all stop when the kids arent here for a few days either.
Yup good point, csa has to cover everything, like extra curricula activities, school uniforms, books, school fees, clothes and even part of rent/utilities if you think about it. Child support is supposed to cover half or a part of their portion of the household living expenses. Honestly, aside from cases where partner is a ceo, doctor, lawyer in high paying position, csa never really covers half of anything, well that's just my experience with myself and the people I know. The non custodial parent in most cases def gets the best deal, if the primary care giver added everything up over the year, day in day out, it would be much more. On the other hand, I also don't agree with fathers that pay huge amounts because they earn significant salaries, as that is more supporting a lifestyle for the mother than the needs of the child.
Budget so you pay more the other weeks and dont have it coming out that week. Its not money for that week. Its money for the time he has him, divided into weekly payments.
Use the weeks you dont have him to budget for the weeks you do.
The payments are based on a weekly percentage of your overall income from the previous tax year.
They also take percentage of care into the equation (along with a few other things) when coming up with your weekly payments.
If CS knows the custody agreement in place, they'd have already adjusted your weekly payments to reflect this. This is why you have to pay on the weeks you have him.
Paying in advance may be considered a gift in some cases, so it may be better to start putting some money aside each week for when you have him.
Do you have a budget in place?
You'd be surprised at how much money people waste without realizing it. Write out everything you spend on a weekly basis and see where you can cut corners.
Check any phone and Internet providers to make sure you're on the best deal you can be.
Check your grocery bill and see where you can cut corners.
Also look for free or cheap activities you can do with your son. Near me, lots of things pop up during school holidays.
With all that being said, CS payments can be reviewed if you're honestly struggling.
If you are earning less than what they're basing your payments on (such as, if you did overtime or extra shifts you're no longer doing, or your pay has changed) they can review your case and change your payments if appropriate.
However, they can and will make you pay backpay at tax time if you've underestimated anything.
I've read and re read this multiple times, what do you mean by your ex has cut off your 11 year old?? Is he not having him anymore and you are having him full time? My ex pays me $300 a f/n for 3 kids. I'm one of the lucky ones who ex's actually pay child support and doesn't whinge about it. He stopped paying when he didn't have a job, but has recently gotten a new job and is paying again. Thank god because raising kids is hard and expensive. If he decided he was not going to pay for them when they were at his house that would cause a strain on my normal day to day life. It would put a strain on the kids normal day to day life. They wouldn't be able to live how they are used to etc. I managed for 6 months but they were a hard 6months I was also buying food for the kids while they were at his place. You could always contact the child support agency and let them know that your income and circumstances have changed but if you're still earning the same amount but have increased your outgoing costs it isn't going to work in your favour. I know it hard for the non custodial parent and you and your ex have obviously decided that he has primary care for a reason. Maybe you can look at your budget first and see where all your money is going and try to reign in some of your own expenditure before you decide to stop paying your ex to raise your child.
It's a typo I'm pretty sure she meant 'custody' not 'cut off'
We have 50/50 care and we still have to pay $150 a week every week. So I think your end of the deal isn't that bad.
I've got to tell you, if my ex asked me to forgo child support during the small amount of time he has her, I would see red. Child support is for the day to day care and maintenance for the child, including putting a roof over their head, clothing, school, extracurricular activities and the millions of little things that go in between all that. Suck it up. It sounds like you have ample time to prepare and save for your son's visits. I have an amount that automatically gets transferred to an online only savings account out of my pay every fortnight. I can transfer it back if I desperately need it, but otherwise it gets saved. Or arrange with your employer to have an extra amount of tax taken out of your pay every week, then at tax time you will get a lump sum back that you can put away for when he visits.
My ex told me to call the CSA and tell them he had our son for those extra nights in the school holidays..when i did the lady scoffed and said it makes no difference and he will still have to pay it.
Now, just because hes not there for the week, deosnt mean the child support money wont be going towards things your son needs. Eg shoes, clothes, stuff for school.etc
You may just have to put a little bit of money aside each week leading up to school holidays so you have the spare money to do activities with your son. There is generally 10 weeks before school holidays. $10- $20 a week and there is a bit of extra spending money.