So long story short,
My brother has been in and out of jail for a while now, he has a 2 year old little girl. He is a drug addict and so is the mother of my niece. She has 2 other kids not to my brother, all her family are on drugs and not very stable. She has had dhs there quite a few times and it's only a matter of time before those kids get taken off her. There is no way I'll just sit back and watch my niece get taken into foster care expecially when myself and my fiancé are more than willing to step up and raise her along side our children. We have a very stable loving home and can financially support her growing up.
The thing is. I've only met her once when she was born because I choose not to bring my children around there lifestyle. Would I have any rights going for custody if it ever came to it? All I want is for her to live a happy full life with people who put her needs before there own. A child who is loved and fed and showered everyday and she's just not getting that at the moment.
What's my rights with my niece.
What's my rights with my niece.
Posted in:
Kids
3 Replies
I don't think you'd get custody but dhs would certainly consider your suitability to foster before considering strangers. Where possible they do tend to prefer to place kids with family members. So that's the good news. The bad news is they like where possible to try and keep families together so it would take them a while and some very delinquent parents who are not even trying to get to the point that kids will be taken and made a ward of the state. If it gets to that point I believe you could apply to become legal guardian.
Maybe you can visit her by yourself, I understand not wanting that lifestyle around your children, but you need to establish a relationship with your niece, so if/when she is taken she has a bond with you. You can then see what conditions she is in and monitor it, see her needs etc, if she needs food/clothes etc. don't ever give money though buy them, cut the tags off and keep receipts
Hi reading your story brings me to tears. I am living your exact life right now. Exact!
i have a gorgeous 7 yo niece. She has been with me under a foster arrangement for 10 months and is looking like for another 6 at least.
We also hardly new her before bc I also didn't want my kids around that world but when we heard about DHS involvement in her life we approached them and told them we were available if it were to be that she be removed. I started by making lots of noise....MAKE LOTS OF NOISE!! How I got her removed was I started just taking her for the weekend, DHS encouraged the mother to do so. When she was with me I was able to clearly document the significant neglect and emotional abuse and extreme danger to domestic violence (mothers new partner). As soon as I started documenting and making noise they started testing her, within a few months she was removed. It's a long and emotional process being kinship carers but completely rewarding ( I say this watching her sleeping peacefully and safely in my house). You will never know the issues that this child will come to you with and there will be many, so be prepared to be more than a carer, you will be so much more than that. For example one issue of he many i had to face was I had to toilet train my neice bc at 6 they Had not taught her to control her bowels and extreme stress and starvation at times didn't help. However once in our house we immediately saw a difference in her and I am so thankful for it.
The trouble is that the system doesn't work and I can't begin to rave on about how unjust the courts are towards Childrens wellbeing, always favouring parents rights and watching my neice flourish and then regress based on courts forcing extra visitations and so on. however she would have you to fight for her like I do for my niece and the time you would spend with her would be invaluable to her development.
In terms of getting full custody that is very difficult bc they will always favour parents even if it can mean that children will Never reach their full potential which is the horrible truth.
I'm halfway thru my story and for my neice I can only hope their is a happy ending and she gets to stay with us and life a full and happy life however the decision isn't with us it's with the courts.
Good luck on your journey, contact DHS let them know you are an option and get the ball rolling. You never know. I never wanted my neice in foster care either. It is a very emotional journey, worth it and important. Be prepared to fall in love and know that you will be heart broken in ways you could have never imagined but always know you did your best, you may jus be able to save her or at least give her reprieve from her life and hope that in that time mum will be a better parent.