Sorry this might be long.
Ok so I have this friend that I've known for years. We get along and have no real issues. She doesn't work as her and her partner decided she'd be a stay at home mum for their 3 kids. Now, she has confided in me numerous times about their finances and where they stand. I've tried to help with ways to manage money etc. I'm a single mum and manage a 1,000 times better then them yet I'm on less money.
So a couple of months ago she tells me about this bill she got. It's not a small one we are talking over $1,500. So we sat down and looked at everything. My suggestion in the end was that they spend a lot of money on things they don't need. Husband buys whatever he wants when he wants and she is forever buying stuff for the kids and house they don't need. Every time they go out the kids get something. It's that bad that when I've had the kids for the weekend they expect when we go to the shops that they will get something! It doesn't go down well when I say no. So I suggested cutting back the impulse spending and putting money towards the bill on a weekly basis. I had some other suggestions too but this was the one thing I noticed they do that doesn't help them.
So fast forward to last week and she tells me that she is claiming single parents pension with Centrelink. Not only that but she has put me down as someone they can call to verify the info. The thing is they are still together and are living together. I was like, oh ok. She said she's doing it till she pays these bills out (another two have arrived) and then will call and let them know they are back together. I was shocked when she told me as she'd never mentioned this before or even asked me, so if Centrelink had of called me I wouldn't of know but thought well it will help them and it's only for a short time.
So during the week I'm talking to a mutual friend of ours at school. I was collecting one of my friends kids as she had another one at the Dr's. So we were discussing kids etc when we got onto Centrelink as this other friend had been in there to give them forms for her new baby. Anyway, she goes on to say that they have been struggling a bit after the new baby financially (he's not well and has had some specialist bills). She then says she'd love to have the confidence to do what our friend has been doing and claiming single parents for 12mths even though she's not single. I was blown away as I thought it was only a recent thing and for a reason. So we started to discuss it and she said she thought I knew.
Seems my friend had started to claim last year. She had used both of us on the forms for Centrelink and whilst she told this mural friend it was to help with bills, it has been going on longer then she has told me.
Now here's my dilemma; on one hand I feel bad for her and her situation but I also feel that they have made this situation by not being able to live within their means. I want to report her to Centrelink but I don't know if it's because it's wrong what she's doing or because I'm hurt by the lies she's told. I know it's wrong and that others do it but is that enough to justify what it could do to her if Centrelink found out? Guess it's hard because we are friends but she's also put me in a sticky situation. I have decided since talking to our mutual friend, if Centrelink was to call me I'd tell them the truth but seeing they never called in the first place I doubt they'd call now. So if you were in my situation would you keep quiet or report her?
12 Replies
Honestly that's something I'd report. They are taking the piss! They aren't struggling they aren't even close to struggling they are doing the wrong thing, very deliberately and using your name in doing so. No way in hell is that ok.
This isn't a short term thing, these people are takers, that think that rules and the law doesn't apply to them.
Everytime your friend does this it hurts people like you by the government tightening rules, spying on innocent people on Facebook etc.
Don't verify! You could get in trouble if they find out you are lying
Report! That is a bloody joke. If they are struggling with money she needs to get off her arse and get a job not expect a free ride to get themselves out of debt they got into.
Yep I wouldn't risk your own payments for this shit. Call then and say its dodgy and you want it clear you will not verify it and want nothing to do with it.
I'm a single full time working mother and this makes me so angry I can't tell you. I would be reporting it. She is not entitled to this money and it could be going to people that actaully need it. Irrespective of whether she has involved you by putting your name down I couldn't be her friend because this is her character. Like "receiving a bill" is any excuse. This is not short term and she will keep taking for as long as it handed to her. Last year I paid $13000 in tax and I got $75 back. That's no typo and you read that right. Sorry but your friend is a sponge and she is using you.
Put the onus on her. Let her know that this is a serious offence and she could go to gaol if it is found out and she is charged. Not to mention having to pay the money back. Tell her to stop NOW (the longer it goes on, the worse it gets in terms of consequences). Don't threaten her with reporting her yourself. But Centrelink have numerous ways of matching data and stuff - it's only a matter of time before she gets found out.
You can report online anonymously ive done it and would do it again its not fair on thosevthay work hard and genuinely struggle or thise who need support. If shes capable of working there is no need to be lying get a job pay your bills legitimately
I would honestly report. We all have bills, expected & unexpected. I'm partnered with a very low income job (Childcare) & my OH is a SAHD looking after our 3 children. We struggle. We don't spend beyond our needs though. We do the right thing & pay our bills with the money we are truly entitled too. She is scamming the system. It's wrong on all levels. This money going to her should be going to people genuinely single & who deserve it. I read comments saying a true friend wouldn't report her? So they would rather watch her eventually get caught out & go to jail? Kids visiting their mother in prison? No. A true friend is someone who does right by their friends & in this case the right thing to do is to report her & teach her a life lesson ... Nothing in life is easy. Bills arrive & must be paid. She should be speaking to a financial advisor (which are free from some services) that way she can learn to handle her rightful money correctly.
You can report it anonymously online or over the phone. In the end you'll be doing her a favor because if she continues to claim when not eligible, there is a higher probability of prosecution.
And FYI, most people that report these situations are close friends &/ or family. Only people who are close to the situation know the details required to report them.
Take care xx
No true friend would ever expect you to lie and place yourself in danger of losing your payments. If they have enough money to spend it unwisely they DO NOT need welfare. She and her partner are the reason people who truly need it have to jump through hoops. Please report her.
I wouldn't report but at the same time if they called I wouldn't lie for her. Its really up to you.
I'm going to go aginst the grain here and say friends don't report friends.
You can let her know how it makes you feel though.