Hi Mummies. I have recently discovered some worrying behaviors in my 2 boys. Mr 8 and Mr 6. They live with me and my husband (and baby sister) and go to their fathers every second weekend.
I was updating Mr 8's tablet and deleting files and came across a couple of videos he took of Mr 6. The videos were showing Mr 6 running around naked outside, focusing mainly on his penis. According to the time stamp on the video this was about 4.30pm. The youngest seemed to have gone outside dressed, stripped and did his thing, then got dressed and came back inside. I certainly would have noticed a naked child running out the front door!
I'm not pointing fingers at anyone but Mr 6 told his grandma he was watching tv/movie while with his father that was showing a naked man (not sure on the exact details).
My husband and I sleep naked (sorry for TMI) and the kids do see us naked if we go to the bathroom or are getting dressed, but we certainly don't "flaunt" the nakedness.
Is this normal behavior for kids this age (just being silly) or should this be waving red flags?
I've also noticed recently that Mr 8 seems to be having some anger management issues especially towards his little brother. Is this a hormone surge or again something that should be investigated?
We do keep the kids on a fairly tight leash in regards to their behavior and punishments, but the punishments don't seem to make a difference so we are upping the punishments at the moment. I.e Mr 8 bit his brother in an argument so the punishment was a 4 week ban on technology and a week not being allowed to play with his brother unsupervised (like riding their bikes in the yard or playing in the bedroom together).
My husband and myself are at a loss as to where to go from here.
Possible sexual behavior in young boys
Possible sexual behavior in young boys
Posted in:
Health & Wellbeing, Behaviour, Kids
6 Replies
As a mother to a now 21 year old man. Boys are absolutely fascinated by penis's. They like to compare them, have sword fights, tug on them, look at them in mirrors and show other people!
Plus running around naked, lots of kids do this. Plus the entire 'dare factor'.
I remember my neighbours and myself looking at each other's assholes at around 6 years old.
Kids do get more difficult to handle around 8 years old.
So no in the face of it I do not see this as sexualised behaviour. Does that mean it doesn't need some correction? No. But it doesn't make me jump to sexual abuse.
Have you had a conversation with them about private and public body parts etc? Who is allowed to touch?
They probably need some boubdaries with iPads etc only in loungeroom which is a good rule to have if they are accessing YouTube etc.
have you asked the dad about it? He could have been on the loo or something, when the kids did it!.
Sounds normal to me!
Just speak to them about privacy and online safety. Possibly have them supervised when using technology.
Speak to their dad about making sure they're supervised when outdoors or on technology, but I wouldn't be blaming him at this stage. We all know that all we have to do is blink and our children are up to mischief!
Boys think penis's are hilarious. Just like they think bums and poo and wee and farts are hilarious. I think this is pretty normal silly boy behavior I'm sure they thought it was super funny at the time!
With their ipad, just make sure they haven't got internet access, I know my 8 yr old nephew had been making youtube videos without his mum even knowing until she saw them. Totally innocent ones of minecraft, but you have to be so careful of what kids can access.
Crikey... pretty tough punishment. An 8 year old would forget what the punishment is for if it goes for a month. Might be less anger issues if the punishments were shorter... just a thought.... good luck
Be careful with how you punish them. Long punishments are less likely to sink in if its for a bite even if he's old enough to understand. Also punishment in the form of not letting him have freedom around his brother is probably going to cause problems aswell. Instead of bringing them closer your treating the older one like being with his brother is a privilege and treating him like he's dangerous. I understand keeping an eye on them for a while if their fighting but drawing them further apart with things like this is only going to cause more issues. maybe keep a closer eye on them for the day. Instead of having it as time away from his brother alone maybe the punishment can just be less of the actual activity. Worded and treated differently can change a lot
To all the mummas saying "4 weeks is a long time for a punishment" I know this. I have tried shorter punishments (a day or 2 ban) and he don't seem to care about it. When he asks if he can play with his ipad, I tell him "no, you aren't allowed it for x more days because you bit your brother" (the biting incident happened twice in about 3 days). This longer punishment seems to be doing some good. I am at my wits end trying to find a punishment that works for him, and at the moment I AM going to extremes to see if that works. I wasn't keeping him from his brother, they still ate together, went out together and played in the lounge room with me. I was just sick of the fights