Eating disorders

Hey sisterhood. Ummm so I've been seeing a clinical psychologist and I've slowly been opening up to him, like I've been opening up to him, but I've realised I have deeper thought and emotions... Anyway, I have a couple of things I want to admit to next time I see him and one of them is that I struggled with bulimia in high school (undiagnosed, no one still knows).... But I've just realised that I think I've been struggling with it since then (12 years ago). I'm always so obsessed with weight loss since high school, constantly feeling crap about myself (I'll be truthful and I'm not fat by any means, If I lost another couple of kgs I'd be underweight, but I feel fat and horrible). I'm really terrible when it comes to food, I'm constantly trying different diets and trying to create lifestyles that just don't stick and then I'm constantly binge eating and I'll eat without realising I've eaten the entire fridge, and by the time I realise I think whatever may as well finish it (no matter how sick I feel). I've realised that I go through phases depending on my emotions (I struggle with anxiety too), If I'm feeling really low, I'll binge eat really frequently and vomit (I just think it and I'll vomit), if I'm a little ok I fast after a binge because I don't want anymore calories, or if I'm feeling a bit more positive, I'll be more motivated to go to the gym a lot to compensate. Lately Ive been feeling really down because of all the things being brought up in my sessions and I've started vomiting again after meals. I don't really know what I'm asking now that I've written all this up, but my next session isn't for another 2 weeks, I really wish I could see him sooner!