Don't post to FB please. Almost every Mother's Day I can remeber I always get down a couple days before. I just don't feel like I deserve to be 'celebrated', I don't feel like I'm a good enough mother. My husband and I have 3 kids (newest is just over 3 weeks old). It feels like my husband isn't attracted to me, I mean what man knocks back sex? I'm overweight (always have been) & my inner negative voice continually reminds me that maybe he would find me attractive if I wasn't so fat and ugly. I know logically that this is bullshit but when I feel like this it's just what comes into my head. I feel like I should be doing so much more for my kids although again, I know that I do friggen everything now, I often think that they wouldn't notice (husband included) if I didn't come home only for the housework not being done. There's also a bit of money Stree atm which isn't helping - so basically this means I'm getting nothing tomorrow (aside from
What the kids have made at school which I know is way more worthwhile than bought crap) I know it's silly to feel like this but I never have my husband go without on special days for him, I always make sure he gets at least something, even something small, at least it's something. Even a card would've been nice. It's not like it's not known that Mother's Day is coming up. Just makes me feel so unloved and just sad. I know this is a bit of a jumble of thoughts, just needed to vent. I wish I could stop crying :(
Struggling with feelings of inadequacy on Mother's Day
Struggling with feelings of inadequacy on Mother's Day
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Parenthood Guilt
3 Replies
Aw Hun, you've got some baby blues and that's ok, your hormones are out of control right now. I find leading up to my birthday and to Mother's Day I get really anxious too because of very different reasons. I think you need to give yourself a break with regards to you body shaming yourself, you've just spent nine months growing a human in it, it's ok to feel like hell. I'm here if you want to vent some more, no judgement, just one new mummy to another new mummy. And, I wish you a wonderful mummy day tomorrow, take some time for yourself tomorrow, listen to some music, read a few chapters in a book or take an extra long shower but go take some time for you tomorrow.
Hugs to you mumma. I feel the same around my birthday...always have and always will and I dont know why. However this year hubby was away and it took him not 1, not 2 but 3 phonecalls and a txt msg to him from my sister just to wish me happy birthday. I then thought oh he knows he upset me ill get some flowers right? Wrong!! I was sooo hurt i told him straight out that I go out of my way to make him feel special and appreciated on his special days whether it be fathers day or his birthday and he couldnt do the same for me?!?! You need to talk to him and let him know you just want something little like i said to my hubby i dont give a crap (nice version) if its a 20c card and a chocolate bar. Just something to show me he thought of me and appreciated me. Men are dumb as dogsh!t when it comes to this sort of stuff. Needless to say after I went off my tree at him I do know he has organised a gift for me for tomorrow. Definetly talk to him about it or he will think there is nothing wrong and things wont change. I hope you do enjoy tomorrow and remember you have 3 precious children who love their amazing mummy unconditionally
I agree....men are totally clueless. I had to send my husband to the shops this year with the older children and insist he help them buy something! lol I have also decided I'm not going to remind him of my birthday this year (it is just a few months away and only a few weeks after his. We have been together for 10yrs....surely he can remember 1 day! We don't do wedding aniversaries (which is why we got married on Feb 29th - that way there isn't so many to worry about lol)....just birthdays and mum and dad days.....Christmas and Easter I sort every year! Hugs to all the mum's who are left organising EVERY darn date on the calendar and feeling totally unappreciated!