I've been with my husband for 5 years, married 3. Together we have 6 kids. He has 3, i have 2 and we have 1 together.
We have had full custody of all 6 for 3 years now. We barely get any assistance from centrelink as my husbamd works dam hard and earns quite a bit. We get minimal child support for 4 of them.
My husbands ex barely contacts her kids and has recently told the kids shes pregnant to her new boyfriend. They are heart broken. She barely bothers with them yet is now having a new baby and a new life without them.
My problem is, we get next to nothing in child support for the 3 of them and they all have school camp this year. Last year my daughter went and my husband made a point of her dad paying half. Now its his kids going on camp and frankly we cant afford all of them as they total $1500. I have said he should make their mother pay for half but he refues to even talk to her.
Im feeling like crap as I'm the one that has put my life on hold to be a stay at home mum so we could have them full time and they treat me like shit and dont appreciate anything i do for them. I take them to all appointments whether it be dental, ortho, couselling and all sporting games and training sessions yet the sun still shines out their mums arse. She forgot both her daughters birthdays this year and foe the past three years they havent recieved presents let alone cards.
I'm just frustrated with the whole situation.
Step parenting blues
Step parenting blues
Posted in:
Parenthood Guilt
4 Replies
It's tough being a Step parent x
Sending love from a fellow step parent who gets treated like the enemy, despite only wanting what's best for the step child and putting my own life on hold to make sure it happens.
It's incredibly hard being a step parent x
Hi from a fellow step parent xx
Firstly. It's the toughest thing I've ever done. Tougher than being a 'parent' that's for sure. You do everything with no appreciation and in a lot of cases you're the evil one.
I have to say that in my case it's my ex husband who doesn't have any involvement with the kids. I have to pay for everything. I don't even bother asking him. I have to admit I do feel a sense of guilt about it. So - please don't be so hard on your husband. I'm sure he feels the same.
You have to accept that things are the way they are. It's shit! But it is what it is.
I would suggest contacting the school to ask if there is any possibility of a discount. I mean seriously $1500!!! Surely they can contribute something toward the mammoth cost. Failing that you either have to live on struggle street for a while to pay for it or they just can't go.
I understand you're upset because of the situation but it's like comparing oranges and apples. If your ex is able to pay half he should. If his ex was able to (and by the sound of things she's not since you get hardly any maintenance) then she should too. But... Clearly your hubby doesn't even want to go there.
I live in the hope that the kids are going to realise and understand the truth as they get older. I can only hope.
Good luck.
They treat you like the enemy as you are all they wish there own parent could be, I am not a step parent but a step child, I was so lucky to have the family I did where my parents and step parents all got along and we had Xmas together every year as it was truely about us kids, but now seeing my niece and the way she treats her step mum because her mum is in and out of her life and self obsessed it breaks my heart, her step mum is all any child could ever want( she is my personal inspiration as she is just a bucket full of love) but my niece treats her like shit, at first I was thinking it was because of fear of her dad being taken away from her, but now I see just how much it hurts her to have all she wanted but it's not from the person she wants it most from- all I can say is hang in there I'm sure it breaks your heart especially since you work so hard to raise so many kids but know it's not you or your fault, your just being everything and doing everything they wish their mum was capable of, in time they will appreciate you and all you done and were to them even if it's not fair, you will still be the most inspirational person in their lives and the older they get the more they will realise this, much love mumma you are amazing