Background Info: We have been separated since our daughter was 1.5 she is now turning 3 and the discussions have started about school. My ex is used to having the control and our whole relationship was based around this. Since separating I have regained my control and I am able to stand up to him now. He earns good money while I am working casually and studying.
He has suggested and is persisting that she goes to a private school and he is happy to pay for it.
I am putting up the fight that she doesn't need to go to a private or well known school for a her to get a good education. I'm also not sure where I sit with him having complete control over her schooling.
Before the decision is made I will be doing my research into schools near his and my areas and in between as well as talking to my psychologist in regards to my feelings of giving him control.
My question is: To other separated parents how did you decide on the school your children will be attending?
Are there any mums (or dads) that have allowed the other parent to solely pay for the education? How did that work?
3 Replies
Oh gosh I'm in a similar situation different position tho. I'm the step mum and my husband and I are willing to pay high school fees for a well known private school for my step son and his mother wants him to go to the dodgy public school that's walking distance from her house. We have 50:50 week about custody. I think whatever you do don't think about who has control or what parent gets what they want or what school is closer for either parent. You need to decide what school is best for the child. In our case the private school is 100 times better, we have researched both schools. I know you said you are going to look into and research schools so I think that is a good starting point. Do a school tour of both schools and get Dad to do the same.
Sounds to me like more than the child's best interests being taken into consideration you don't want him to get his way by her going to private school! You don't want to "give him control"
If my ex offered to pay for the best of the best education for our child I would be thankful and jump at the opportunity!
Don't listen to all the negative people on here, it is your life and once you know whether he is using this as a control method. Research all the schools and when you know which one is best go with that. Take into account the families that attend each school and if your daughter and yourself will fit in there as you need to make friends with the parents too. If you have a good public school nearby then maybe suggest that she go there for primary school then private for high school.