I've been with my husband for 13 years we have 4 kids ranging from 10 to 2 I work fulltime and he stays home which is what I wanted, I've noticed in the last 6 months or so he doesn't look after himself it is really like having a 5th child he is over weight (so am I) but I have to remind him to shower if i don't he won't bother, he is too busy playing his play station to talk when I try he says we will talk later.he is sick his dr said loose weight or you will die. (didnt change him) Anyway I thought I would get boudoir photos done and because of the cost discussed this with him to start he was happy but then today said he doesn't want me to waste our money on them. I asked why he said coz he will only look once then put them away I tried to explain that this is for my confidence too but he just said he will just take them. I'm hurt I feel like I don't look good enough for him I feel stupid for bring it up and have gone back to no confidence I don't know how to fix my marriage I dont want to walk away he wont listen to me
how do i make him see what he is doing to my confidence
how do i make him see what he is doing to my confidence
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Health & Wellbeing, Behaviour
3 Replies
This is more than about how he is damaging your self confidence. It sounds like you are both negative about each other. Time to go get marriage counselling.
Personally I think you are over thinking the boudoir shots. Guys don't think the same as we do. They are expensive and honestly if you have confidence issues they won't make you feel good long term. Most boudoir shots do end up in a drawer somewhere!
Honestly that aside it sounds like a lot more is going on other than the photos, the photos are just what you are arguing about at this time.
Sound like he has his own issues, maybe depression?
About your shots, youre right theyre for you, so go and get them and put them up and love them.dont ask his opinion or let his negative reaction affect you. Not doing it because of him is what destroys you.
If he brings you down that much then you have some serious thinking to do about your future.
Another option that won't cost you a cent is to volunteer as a life model for an art class. You won't get a photo or anything to keep but you'll have a class full of people loving every curve for an hour or so. If you want your photos, get them. You work hard and it sounds like you rarely do anything for yourself so just do it. As for the husband... if he's going to act like a child treat him like a child. Put up a sign saying what he needs to do during the day including showering, teeth brushing etc and that there are to be no games until everything is done.