Could I have been an abuser as a child??
this is a really difficult question to ask. I want to know what do you do if you think you may have abused a friend as a child.
I feel sick writing this, as a child a friend and I experimented a little (around 10 years old) and if I remember correctly I was the instigator. Now I was not abused or acting on being hurt myself it was curiosity but I honestly cannot remember if I may have done something to hurt this friend of mine.
I'm absolutely petrified.
I know this woman now and our kids attend school together but she's not interested in knowing me. It's all just occurred to me.
I honestly don't know if this is something that should be spoken about? Or do I just live with suddenly wondering did I hurt her? Because if I didn't am I just opening something that is just going to embarrass us both, or if I did open old wounds and cause hurt to both of us...
I'm so confused, I'm terrified as I now have daughters almost this age.
I'm just horrified to think this could have been me....
1 Replies
No, you are not an abuser. It's extremely common for girls the same age to role play, pretend, act out, experiment together and even of opposite gender to do this. It's curiosity, not abuse. I experimented with about 6 different girls from the age of about 11. It was very much centered around one of us being a boy. When I was 6 I remember a mutual bottom sniffing incident with my male neighbours who were the same age :) I was never abused as a child it was like making two barbies have sex lol
I wouldn't say anything to her, because most people pretend that these things never occurred and I would be mortified if someone from my past brought it up to me, and I was not the instigator. But I don't feel like I was ever abused. It's just like an ex boyfriend from 20 years ago wanting to discuss a specific sex act, odd!
There are lots of reasons why she may not want to have anything to do with you. Personally I have plenty of reasons to not see people from my past and none of them to do with experimenting with them.