Moving in with parents.... my current rental has sold and I'm (not quite) in the position to buy yet. Live in a small town and there's not many rentals - or they're insanely expensive. This is a short term arrangement - within 6 months of saving the rent I have been paying I will have my house deposit. I have 3 children (1, 5, 9) and they would need to share the one room. My father works off-shore so is hardly ever home, and my mother works full time. (on a side note, I get along really well with both my parents) I Want to hear about others experiences with moving "home" kids in tow. Is this a bad idea - will sharing a room scar the kids lol, am I better off just taking another smaller "run down" rental?
5 Replies
ok I have lived with my parents on and off and it has worked really well for these reasons
1. we have respected each others spaces (I had a tv in my room so I wasn't sitting with them all the time after dinner etc)
2. I kept the house spotless so my parents felt I wasn't taking advantage
3. my parents never felt the need to parent my kid unless they were babysitting and they were never used as a babysitting service anymore than they were used before I moved in.
4. I paid my way, not necessarily rent but contributed to electricity, water, gas, food (as much as I was before moving home).
5. I made sure my parents had the house to themselves at set times (went and stayed in a caravan park for a weekend)
The three kids will be fine for 6 months. Kids used to share all the time, own rooms is a modern construct.
I'd say do it! If it's going to get you into your very own place that much sooner, do it!
You always have the option of changing things if it does not work.
There are enough rooms in my house that they can each have their own and still have a spare and they still prefer sharing.....
Its not a bad thing to share rooms
We spent 3 months in a tent 3 months living in vacant offices with a shower and kitchenette, in order to relocate to an affordable state (I was paying more to live in MY OWN tent than my current mortgage repayment) and 12 months later 6 months in a caravan park cabin less than half the size of the kitchen I have now for the sake of house hunting and buying a house. You do it because it pays off in stability long term...
Me and three kids...they were preschoolers prep and a toddler when in the tent and vacant shop and the cabin was an entire year later as the youngest hit preschool.
No matter what it is it is a roof and you make it work.
The day the house settled and we packed up what was in the cabin and handed in the keys the caravan park owner asked where we were going. I explained that we were moving into a 5 bedroom house of our own....
His response, "those kids and you have earned it! Good luck and enjoy"
I did it this way because moving home wasn't an option. Besides them selling the 'home' and buying a motorhome, my mother is/was toxic she has to be taken in small doses.
I live with my family, with my 8y/o (with adhd), I pay board that covers both my son and I, I also buy extra food as I feel that I'm not paying enough but my parent won't accept any more $$$. My mum does look after my son while I work part time, but on my days off I also do a lot of housework. Families have been putting kids in the same room for forever, while they won't have much personal space as what they maybe used of, it's six months, don't stress. I guess the biggest thing if you want it to work is to not make them feel used, keep offering to cover the extra costs of you being there, help out around the house, even if your mum says " no don't worry about it", and with your dad working away a lot, make sure your parents get some alone time while he's home, even if all they do is have dinner in front of the TV just the two of them.
As a kid who shared a room, no, sharing will not scar them lol. I have been back with my parents for some years now. I moved back in when my daughter started school so mum could help with school run etc. Plus rent was increasing. It was only supposed to be a short term measure but it has worked out for all of us, so we stayed. If I need my own space, I have tv/dvd in my room. Likewise, my daughter and I will sometimes hole up there together if we want to spend time "just us". Its nice, having adult company around on a regular basis! My parents don't undermine my authority with my daughter and I am very conscious to pay my way, board plus extra groceries etc. I do all our own laundry etc and we take turns with cooking and stuff.