Feel like a failing Mother & Fiancé

Hi Mummies,

I am struggling so much and am need of some support.

I am currently 29 weeks pregnant with my second child. I already have a darling little boy who it 3 and a half.

A bit of background, last year I suffered with depression badly and quit my job. My wonderful Fiancé was such a good support despite him not fully understanding everything I was going through.

I overcame it, however April this year was diagnosed with Anxiety Disorder. I am on medication for it and am coping with it.

I went back to work January this year (I'm a personal care worker for the aged) and was going ok. However, as of 3 weeks ago I have had to quit working again. It was discussed between my partner and mother and they both agreed it would be safest.

I was suffering very low blood pressure, my heard rate was at a constant 135bpm, I was having the occasional black out, I couldn't walk 5 metres without being extremely out of breathe, and I was extremely weak during these episodes.

I am a SAHM, my son goes to daycare one day a week, and to his Grandads another day, and is at home the rest of the time with me. I am studying a double diploma full time, and I try and keep on top of the house work. (Which was my request as it was my way of contributing to what my partner brings in money wise)

The past week and a bit though the episodes described above have been happening again. I manage to feed the dogs, cats and my son in the morning and then I crash as I feel so ill and weak.

I feel useless. I am barely getting anything done in the house. It's a mess!

My fiancé constantly tells me it's ok, not to stress, he is here to help as well. I just feel so horrible that he goes to work at 6am comes home at 3 to a house that's not perfect.

How can I change this around? How can I feel I am achieving something?

I know I shouldn't beat myself up about not being perfect in people's eyes, I just wish I could do more for my family.