Hi Sisters.
My partner is a full time dad. We have been together for 3.5 yrs. His kids want nothing to do with me let alone meet me. It's distroying our relationship as we want to move forward together.
His kids see how happy I make him yet won't let us be all together.
My partner adores my son & treats him like his own.
His kids say they don't want another mum. They don't like the fact there is an age gap between us.
I don't want to walk away from my soulmate but I don't see we have any other choice.
Can anyone offer any advice on my situation TIA
After some advice on partners with teenage kid's.
After some advice on partners with teenage kid's.
Posted in:
Teenagers, Tips and Advice
3 Replies
Its their home their space their father. Respect it.
I'm not saying you can't have a relationship but perhaps they are picking up on things they arent impressed with....these are teens.....you may have trod on toes.step back and try another approach.
My kids werent teens they were preschoolers and I STILL insisted they first met my partner away from the house even if for six months I was shoving him out the back door if the toddler cried.....
He met them at the cinema and he wasn't to enter the front door of the house until they invited him in....and they did after the movie and milkshakes.......
Do you respect their dad as their dad have you shown them the respect of respecting it as their home?
If after 3.5 years he hadn't been prepared to tell his kids to pull there heads in then he isn't your soulmate!
It sounds like the teens rule the roost in this situation and although I think you have to be respectful of there feelings 3.5 years is long enough. You aren't some woman he picked up at the pub on the weekend and is having loud abnoxious sex with. You have been together 3.5 years.
He clearly isn't prepared to stand up to his kids and that makes him a really bad partner and not someone you want to wait for. His kids will always be his top priority, even more than normal. They will always dictate the terms and although I believe my child comes first and taking things slow and giving them time to adjust your partner sounds like he has taken it to the extreme.
I'd be moving on now.
Maybe try all going to counciling mediation etc. It helped us and the kids so much and we had been together for 3.5 years. Being a step parent is the hardest thing you will ever do communication is the key.