How do other mums or dads handle a toddler who can't be taken to the shops? My toddler will not sit in the pram for longer than ten minutes without wanting to go onto a ride or play in the shopping centre play gyms. He then screams if he sees a ballon because he wants one. Everything is a struggle. I have tried enticing him with food. Only lasts maybe two minutes then he is over it. I have also tried the iPhone. It's got to a stage where we can't leave the house to go to the shops. It's an absolute nightmare. I do have a super BUSY toddler. I don't want to be house bound but I am thinking that I might have to be until this phase passes.
10 Replies
Practice, practice, practice and sometime you just have to let them cry!
I know that sounds awful. But sometimes you just have to suck it up and work through it.
So practice going to the shops when you don't have to get anything. Put them in the pram and head to the shops. Walk past the desired item, and walk straight past it. Don't stop! Even if that means you just walk straight past it and back to the carpark for them to cry it out in the car. Do it when you aren't tired or stressed. So you can follow through. This will pass as he gets older and realises you just can't have it!
Thank you! Some really good tips! I will give all of this a go.
I go through the rules every single time we go to the shops in the car before we get out and get my 2 year old to repeat them back eg. No shouting, no carrying, sitting nicely in the trolley etc. gets better with age!
Hi my daughter was (sometimes still is) a nightmare at the shops. The best thing I found when going shopping was to go first thing in the morning, as in get there at 9 on the dot. That way she is happy and well rested. She naps around 12pm so we can be in and out quick if we start at 9am. She has a short attention span so I only go into 1, sometimes 2 shops at a time. I find anymore that 2 shops and she starts to get bored and wants to run amuck. My daughter is now 2 and 2 months old and I can confirm that it does get better! She now wants to walk with me, help me put stuff in the trolley etc which is great. Hope that helps
I have sung this song before, I should be an Olympic sport shopping with children. You can tell when you go shopping who have children and who don't you have a mixture of people who are able to zone out and go on with there business (parents) and the people who give you filthy looks (non parents).
Don't stop going out, making yourself house bound will mentally make you insane, the only thing you can do is push through it and get that shopping done as fast as you can! I now do shopping when my son is in daycare makes my life so much easier.
I have two old twin boys and agree with all the above. You just have to practice and ignore crying and whinging and just continue on shopping (whilst trying to ignore the looks of others). For me as soon as we see one the $2 cars or trains, I tell them that it is broken (lying I know) but it's better than the scene to take them off it. I find food distracts my two and I promise to go to a park on the way home if they are good.
How old a toddler are we talking? Old enough to help with the shopping perhaps? Give him a "list" (cut pictures out of catalogues and paste them onto pages) and get him to help you find them.
The key is giving them a job. I do a full food shop with my youngest 19mths every week. He knows his spot is in the kids seat in the trolley. His job atm when shopping is to place the things in the trolley basket. We also practice our words as we go around. If the other kids come along they have jobs aswell like marking off the shopping list or helping stack the trolley. I find it alot easier to make it a game. They also knoe if they ask or chuck a tantrum for something then they wont get anything.
Prepare him in the car on the way over. Let him know that he's not getting out of the trolly/pram (personally I like to use a trolly so they can see me, I've never used prams for any of my kids 6, 4, 2), tell him that there will be no balloons, playing etc and that you are just here to do the shopping and go home. I think ppl underestimate how much our toddlers can understand, they can understand quite well. Even at 18mths they can comprehend, you just need to follow through, if you say no, stick to it, if you change your mind and say yes you are teaching him that if he protests enough he will get what he wants.
Also make it a weekly thing too, a routine if you will, Il've been out shopping with all 3 of my kids from about 6weeks (every week, its our Monday morning ritual) with minimal tantrums (we've had a few but more good shopping experiences than bad). I don't do the play gyms or the rides so we just always walk past and wave to them. We sometimes stop for a donut after shopping but not always as a treat. Pick the right time of day too, a tired cranky toddler will be harder to control than a well rested and fed child.
Shopping lists and getting him to help you are good tools too, like asking him to count the apples, or what colour something is. Or letting him have something he doesn't ever get, a treat for going shopping and he only ever gets it when he goes shopping.
Oh I remember those days. Shop online is my advice! It really does pass (at least it did in my own experience with my two girls who are now 3 and 6). Don't be housebound though, take him to playgrounds, kindergym, the beach, the pool, on walks etc. But while he passes through this crazy toddler phase, just do all your groceries online if you can, or drop him with a relative while you get your shopping done. I had to do all mine online for months when my second girl was in that phase, but we're good now. I still use Woolworths online occasionally for my own convenience but both girls are good at the shops these days. The occasional struggle but so much more pleasant than it used to be! Hang in there xo