I seperated from my husband at the start of the year due to his Ice habit. I had seen him using the drug while the kids were in his care and I had also seen him on the phone trying to Score whilst the kids were in his care.
I have removed the kids from his care and offered supervised visitation but he "doesn't have a problem" so didn't see them. I feel guilty at times but I have also seen what he is capable of whilst using.
I know there are others that must be in similar situations, how do you handle it? I won't hand over the kids to someone using. He is doing his own drug tests to prove he's not using. They're not regular and they're days he chooses so he can go clean for 48 hrs to get a neg test. What are my rights with requesting partners be drug tested too? His brother uses ice and I don't want the kids around him either. I'm more than happy to be drug and alcohol tested regularly and randomly as is my new partner.
I'm not sure exactly what my question is but any guidance is appreciated
3 Replies
Kids are not safe when drugs are involved! I wish the system would recognise that. Just keep doing what you feel is right... It's so very hard. Good luck.
My ex is also an ice addict, he is not allowed to see my children unsupervised and I have offered supervised visitation for him to see them, but because it is by someone that isn't me he will not do it. My children haven't seen him in a year now and they understand daddy is sick and we have to wait for him to get better before they can see him. It is a hard situation to be in but you have to do what is right and that is putting their safety first. You are able to go to mediation and court to get him supervised visits at a visitation centre, they are trained to see if someone is under the influence of legal and illicit drugs.
Ring legal aid! Today! Unless there are court orders in place, you are under no legal obligations to send your children if they aren't safe (but ring legal aid and clarify this right for your situation). If he wants to see see his kids ge will need to set up a mediation, when you go to mediation, you can offer him supervised visits until he can provide clean random drug tests for whatever period of time you feel comfortable, and you can also request he seek drug counseling. I hope it all works out for you and yours kids!