I watched today as my 5yo said hello to 2 girls, her kinder classmates at the gate this morning. Both of them ignored her. They said hello to each other, smiled and chatted and didn't even bat an eyelid at my girl. And my daughter kept saying hello. The mums of the girls were right there, and neither if the ladies encouraged their daughter to say hello to mine.
My daughter was visibly upset, but still nothing. She came up to me and I gave her a hug.
This is not the first time I have seen it happen.
Now, I know they are 5, so it is not the end of the world, but it bothered me a little that the mums didn't even bat an eyelid.
I've always encouraged my daughter to say hello, she happily says hello to strangers on the street, when we walk the dog.
I am however concerned for how she will feel at being ignored or excluded. I'm not about to bring it up with anyone either.
I just want some tips on how I can teach my daughter to be resilient, and not to let these things bother her.
I mean, it has obviously bothered me enough to write about it, so it is bound to make her feel a little excluded.
I also don;t want to be a helicopter parent, but oh it really broke my heart today.
Is this normal behaviour for 5yo's? to ignore and exclude other kids?
Any tips appreciated.
5 Replies
Some little girls can be total bitches! Sorry, it's true.
Teach your daughter that it's not about her, and to feel sorry for the little girls who have no manners.
Thank you for replying. I've often wondered whether or not this is the start of bitchy behaviour. Bit sad that it starts at this age. :(
When she's mentioned it before, I always say, if so and so doesn't want to play with you or be your friend - just go and find someone else to play with.
I think, i'm fine to dismiss that these girls were just being little girls, but the mum's? UGH!
What I teach my daughter is not everyone is going to be your friend and that's alright, you will have plenty of friends who will care about you. It has happened to my daughter a few times and it does break your heart to see, but it is all a learning process for them.
No its not normal behaviour. My 5yo says hello to everyone. And if he ever delibretly ignored another child he would get a stern talking to so shame on those girls mothers for not saying anything to them!
I'm hearing ya sister! I've also experienced this, mostly with my middle child (first girl) & it still happens at her school but funny thing is she makes great playmates out at the park or at macca's or anywhere else - is just some sort of clicky or elitist attitude at the school, started in Year 1 for my daughter. But anyway, I get you, & am also like 'what tha?! How can it start so young, who teaches the little girls to be such little snots & snobs like this?!" Then you find out what the mums are like ... :-p