I got married last year in May and in August my then husband started a new job. Things seemed okay but then he started acting different and I caught him on tinder and he shrugged it off as it was only for laughs and he just started acting strange. November came and he came home and said he can't do it anymore. I cried and he cried. I asked if there was anyone else, he said no. That he wanted to live alone and be alone. 3 weeks later told me and our 3.5 to leave while he was away at his brothers wedding. I left with what I could take in my car. All the while w were still sleeping together. 2 weeks after leaving. I noticed another women's shoes in our house. ( still sleeping together) 2 weeks on my daughter met "the other women". Long story short he works with her, she moved in 4 weeks after he left me and lied.
My daughter met her before I even knew she existed even my then step son (7).
I don't know if I should a- give her the time of day. Or b hate her ( yes it does take two but she new he was married w/ kids) c- all above and tell her that he cheated on me with her and up until jan this year we were still sleeping together while they were together. I stopped it as I started to realise it was over and it wasn't right and I'm not going to be the other women.
But I show no negative feelings about her towards my child.
But inside my stomach hurts with hate an pain every time I her that women's name.
What do I do?
Love or hate.
Love or hate.
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Parenthood Guilt, Kids
2 Replies
I'm so sorry this happened. Although the woman did the wrong thing without a doubt, I think the anger and hurt towards her is misplaced. She didn't marry you, she didn't cheat on you, she didn't lead you on, she didn't make you any promises. Your ex played her, like he played you, she just doesn't know it yet.
Unfortunately telling her how you feel won't get you anywhere. It won't make you feel better, and it won't change the situation. If you need to vent etc, write letters, journal, vent in a way that's safe. Unfortunately kids are involved and although they did the wrong thing you need to find a way to rise above the rotten way they treated you.
It hurts so much to be cheated on. You are better than them x
As hard as it is remember this:
The best revenge is success.
You are worthy.
You did nothing wrong.
You are better off without that toxic man in your life.
I really can't imagine the pain you're feeling so I won't pretend to. I think that the other woman must have known what she was doing. You noticed her shoes... In your house! Come on - she must have known. She was in YOUR HOUSE! She should never trust him and he should never trust her. Who does that? SCUM that's who!! She deserves anything you can throw at her but don't do it! She did you a favour and they deserve each other.
Just let it go. Find joy (easier said than done) and show them both.
I am so very sorry this has happened to you. Sending ginormous hugs and positive vibes.
Smile. Because you deserve to xx