I have just started seeing a man who is very kind and gentle. He is a perfect gentleman, however he has PTSD and I have very little understanding of this condition. I'm looking for stories of people who have ben in a relationship with someone who has this condition or been in a relationship with someone who has this condition.
Dating a man with post traumatic stress sundrome (PTSD)
Dating a man with post traumatic stress sundrome (PTSD)
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Mental Health
6 Replies
I have this condition. My ex was severely abusive (major DV relationship) After 3 years of it I ended up in hospital almost dead. I still went back until my husband now pulled me away from him.
PTSD effects you in your everyday life. Well at least it does for me. So any things trigger me, fights, yelling, sex in movies (there was sexual assault too), any kind of angry tone, someone who drinks alcohol, when my husband gets too amped up when taking about things like a fight at work which almost got physical. It send me into an extreme anxiety attack. I shake like a prairie dog, my heart pounds and a lot of the time I throw up. My natural instinct when this happens is to grab the nearest object and attack.
PTSD is different for everyone just like depression and anxiety are different per person. Basically there are things that will trigger and your logical thinking shuts off and fight or flight happens. Maybe sit down and talk to him about it. Ask him about what his triggers are (you'll find a better way of putting it than I can haha xx) Ask him what he would like you to do when he has an episode (that's what I like to call it) and basically just let him know that you're there for him and that you support him. I hope this helps in some way xxx
Thank you for your reply.
I do plan on talking to him about it, but this is all very new and I just need to figure out how to approach it.
Just be open. Tell him you feel that way, I'm sure he'll understand xxx
Thank you. He's a really great guy so far. Seems very approachable.
I can't help with any answers/experience. I just wanted to say how wonderful it is that you want to understand and learn about PTSD for your boyfriends sake. I wish you both all the best.
I can't help you on what it's like to date someone with PTSD but I can help you on what it's like to be in a relationship when you have PTSD.
I was diagnosed with it years ago after an abusive upbringing and abusive relationships. It makes it hard sometimes to do even everyday activities, so sometimes I rely on my partner more than I would normally need to.
All I ask for from my partner is a bit of understanding, support and forgiveness when my moods have been low.
It something sets me off or freaks me out, I just ask that he doesn't judge me. That he holds my hand and lets me talk if I need it, or lets me be silent if I don't want to talk. Just for him to be patient with me. I'll talk when I'm ready.
If I shove him away when we're being intimate, I make sure he knows he's not to blame but that he also needs to not push the subject.
But sometimes I take my moods out on him when I know it's not his fault. So I'll do everything to make it up to him, all I just need is his forgiveness.
It all depends on why your partner was diagnosed, though, and how that will affect your relationship.
Do some research, talk to your partner, and be ready for some real battles.
But if it's real love, it'll be worth it.
Good luck xx