Hey Sisters,
Ive previously written to you on multiple occasions about being in an abusive relationship. i did leave, im now with a wonderful man who treats my son and i like we mean the world to him.
Bad news, my ex.
weve been to mediation, hes refusing to say that he agreed to any of what we discussed in mediation. today i recieved a letter to say that hes giving me some "orders". i am assuming at this stage that they are interim orders. i know hes trying to have us relocated back to the town he lives in. I CANT LIVE THERE. i am terrified hes going to take my son. he sees him every second weekend at the moment, we agreed to alternate xmas and easter. share him on birthdays etc.
my son is 2. can he take him or even get 50/50 care?
i know most of this is only being done to spite me, he has never really had time for our little guy. its always been a hassle or something, now hes trying to be this amazing dad when hes not.
what happens what do i do? im terrified. im so scared if we are relocated. im not sure what hell do. he has turned friends against me. i have little support in that town.
please help
2 Replies
Don't panic. Wait for these so called orders. Often these things are just threats and nothing else. Until you get them in your hand it doesn't exist. If the orders are given to you then you worry about them and seek legal advice. Make sure you are getting counselling.
Ok this is the hard bit when you leave an abusive relationship. You still have to deal with the abuser and he will now use your children to get to you. I have had first hand experience of this. Sounds like you have been or will be served an application for interim orders. This is paperwork of the orders that he is seeking. Which doesn't mean a judge will grant those orders. You need to seek legal advise asap. He cannot get you to move back. If you have a high conflict relationship with your ex then the judge would never give 50/50 care. You should also get some counselling this will help you find ways to deal with your ex and his behaviour. In all honesty you are better off going thru the family court and having orders that a court can enforce. Otherwise all you will do is constantly try and negotiate with your ex and that will never work because he loves the conflict and drama. Also never engage him in argument thru text or email. Keep your communication direct and unemotional. Good luck and I'm glad you got out and are happy with a new man who can show you what a healthy relationship looks like ?