I have a very complex question!
My DD is turning 6 this year, and I have been with my current partner 2.5 years. Its been quite an up and down relationship. He has emotionally cheated on me not once but twice with the same woman. I broke up with him and booted him out. And had since forgiven him after counselling and dating dating. And given a last chance to make it work. "I think" I'm starting to see a third time coming this time with another woman. It's never ever been physical always flirty texts or email but this makes me feel disregarded and unwanted as our sex life is crap (twice a month!!!) He's 28!!!! This man treats my daughter as his own! Thing is I want to leave, Because I feel undervalued and disrespected but I'm worried I'm going to give my daughter issues about men by not maintaining successful relationships!!! So I feel obligated to maintain this Relationship for her!! her biological dad and I separated from the time she was 6 months due to indifference. And her biological dad has a great Relationship with her! Any advice would be appreciated! Ps: money isn't an issue i work a professional job. This is purely an emotional choice.
Advice please!!
Advice please!!
Posted in:
Life Lessons, Relationships & Marriage, Parenthood Guilt
5 Replies
You are setting a good example for your daughter if you leave. You are showing your daughter that it's not ok to be treated badly by men and that you don't need a relationship with a man to be successful in life. That as a woman you deserve to be treated with respect, and not have to settle for a man who cheats emotionally, betrays you and treats you less than you deserve. You will be giving your daughter that gift if you leave. The most precious gift of all.
You have been there twice with this same man... Anything from here he just knows he can get away with. By you leaving you will teach your daughter self respect and you will teach her that she she should expect more from a man than to be cheated on, lied to, deceived and betrayed. Personally i wouldn't care if it was just flirting or physical. If he's not 100% yours then that's cheating. If he lies about texts etc. then he is aware that what he has done is wrong and can wear the consequences like a man!
Nothing I can say that the other posters haven't. I think its better to teach her self respect is worth more than a poor long term relationship. Better a strong independent mother than one full of regret for a wasted marriage :) be strong mumma bear and show her the way xx
Look, you have tried everything you can to better and continue this relationship, but he sounds like just does not want to grow up.
Its great he and your daughter have a great relationship, but what type of example is he going set for your daughter as she grows up? That it's ok to be emotionally cheated on?
When you find a man who respects and loves you as a woman and a partner, than your already half way to finding out what type of father figure and influence he will be towards your daughter.
She will learn her self worth and value in her own adult relationship by your and his example.
Wow this is so simple.nothing complex about it.
Teach your daughter to be a strong independent women.to demand better.to give ONE chance and be treated well. Not to settle and not to compromise your self for a anything, definitely not a man,a situation, public perception, pressure, nothing is worth it.