IM. Hi just after some advice. My girl is 9 n she is starting to develop, getting hair in places n boobs r growing. We try not to make a big fuss about it but she often gets picked on at school coz of it. Her teachers know n keep it in mind but she won't tell them when they pick on her. She sees me shaving my legs n stuff n keeps asking if she can but I dont want her to. What would u do?
11 Replies
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If its noticable enough to be teased i'd let her my parents wouldn't let me shave until i was sixteen its not nice to be made fun of for something than can be fixed with a simple razor.
Please let her shave if her body is ready - that extra couple of years won't make a physical difference in the long-term, but it will sure as hell make a psychological one!
Do make a big deal out of it - in a positive way! Talk to her about becoming a woman being something to celebrate, not something to shy away from.
I agree let her shave if it will make her feel prettier. Get her fun underclothes she will like wearing and make it a rite of passage so at least she knows she's supported. Tell her the other kids just don't understand yet, that she is ahead of them and they sure won't be laughing when they catch up to her. Maybe you have a teen friend/relative/babysitter who can relate to her on that level to chat with too? Someone to reinforce that it's normal? Good luck mama!
I was a D cup at 11 and started shaving a lot earlier than that, I was always teased relentlessly and my mum never talked to me about it, I found the razor and started shaving when I wanted to and I went shopping on my own to buy bras and then hid them for a long time.
Support her and teach her what to do, that is far more positive than letting her work it out on her own!
Let her shave , I had big thick hairy legs, the day my mum let me shave was absolutely amazing , I never loved her more than what I did at that point!!!!!, to her it stops the teasing , to you it's a coming of age, and the beginning of letting go. This means more to you than her......
I developed early too, and my mum tried to stop me shaving until i just wouldn't stop wearing track pants to school to hide my legs, all through summer. I was 12 when that happened. You can't do much about what the kids at school do, but you can help her have confidence and ownership of her body. Let her shave. The idea of taking her shopping for nice bras and sort of celebrating her becoming a women is a great idea. A day for just you and her to do 'grown up' things.
If she is getting bullied then yes! Puberty doesn't wait for you to be the 'correct' age to start shaving so don't worry about that. I would give her the option of waxing or shaving but explain she'll have to let her hair get long enough to wax each time. Tell her about the maintainence and let her know it might grow back darker. The other option is the cream that you leave on for a few minutes. Good luck.
My daughter was the same at the same age, we sat and talked about it and she told me that she felt very embarrassed and about the hair it was because of her feelings that I decided to let her start shaving her legs. I don't see a problem with it, she shaves once every few weeks and it helps her to feel nice about her changing body (My daughter has developed extremely quickly, she is almost 12 now but started her period at just after her 11th birthday) You mention she is growing hair, that is one of the last stages of puberty before menstruation begins, she is already turning into a young woman so what is your reason that you wont allow her to shave? At the end of the day there is no right answer its between you and your daughter, best of luck to you.
let her shave ,wax or use a hair removal cream if its going to improve her self esteem .... god only knows kids can be cruel and it can affect her whole time at school ...go have a mummy daughter day and explain the changes she is about to go through and maybe visit a salon to have them done ...I personally would have let my 9 year old do it had she need to she's 13 and she gets her eye brows waxed it teaches her some pride in her appearance and she fits in at school ... I don't think taking pride in your appearance and wanting to look and feel good is a bad thing .... it probably feels like your little girl is growing up to fast to you but at the end of the day she will still be your little girl weather or not she shaves her legs good luck xx
I thought my daughter was going through puberty at 9. My mum's friend who is a GP told her that I should take her to the doc and have her hormones checked and they can delay puberty and it's beneficial to do so because early puberty can stung their growth? I think it was? But also they are not emotionally ready to deal with it.
However my friend took her 9yr old daughter and doc said there is nothing to do. But Mum's friend is a very well respected doc, so I'd get that checked to see if you can slow it down a bit.
As for the shaving, she is going to shave eventually, doesn't really matter. Just get her to shave below the knee for now. And safety razors with the wire across, cos I can't tell you how many times I cute myself, sometimes badly going too fast lol