lease no harsh comments.
I just found out I'm pregnant. Very early stages possibly 5 weeks. The urine test the doctor did only had a faint second line so he repeated it the same day and again a faint line. He is sending me for a blood test tomorrow. This is my problem ... I haven't told my partner and don't know how to tell him. We have a three year old already and when ever I bring up up the idea of wanting another baby he always says "don't be stupid we can't afford it" and when ever we have unprotected sex he always goes on about how stupid we both are. The last month he hasn't been going out of his way to use condoms which is very out of character for him he normally is very strict with that so I kind of thought maybe he wasn't ready to say the words out loud loud that he wants another baby but maybe he does. I can't take the pill due to medical issues so it's all on the condoms. So this week I was due and sure enough didn't get them. He started stressing and saying we are so stupid we are never going to be stupid again iv learnt my lesson. So today when I went to the doctors I told him that the doctor said it's would be to early to tell any way and to wait another week and if I don't get them then he will do a blood test. I know it's wrong to lie to someone who you love and have been with for so long but I'm scared about what he is going to say or what he is going to expect me to do. I personally don't believe in abortion and I don't know if I could bring myself to do it at all. I respect the right to choose but it's not a choice I could make. I'm scared .. really scared. I don't know how to tell him or how to deal with it if he takes it badly. Please help me. Please
pregnant and don't know what to do
pregnant and don't know what to do
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Pregnancy
2 Replies
i think its good you havent told him yet, you are giving yourself some time to get your head around it before you need to deal with whatever reaction he has.
maybe take him to the doctor with you next time? and try not to stress about what his reaction 'might' be. he may take it well once its actually a reality and not just a possibility.
if he has a bad reaction to it he needs to remember that it was also his decision not to use protection and so it is half his responsibility. let him be adjust to the news and allow him time to let it sink in before you guys ave any real discussions about what you are going to do. if you are determined to have this baby then dont be swayed by him. you can always make it work.
So what would be the worst possible outcome? Does he have a violent temper? Do you feel safe? If you are fearful then you need to find a way to let him know about this so that you are safe.
If it's not like that, then just tell him! Like you say, he is at least 50% responsible for this. Even if you do use contraception you need to understand that it's not always 100% effective and if you are having sex you take the risk that it could result in pregnancy. Work through it together.