How do you know when behaviour is no longer normal for the child's age? My son is nearly 8 is really defiant, argues with me about anything. Gets up in his sisters face to fight with her. Has tantis when things don't go his way, and doesn't care if I throw his stuff out. He is also struggling at school from an academic space. He can be negative but the teachers say he is a good class mate, friend at school. Is this just lucky family with age appropriate stuff? Or do I need to take him to get assessed and by who? Thanks stressed
7 Replies
Sounds a lot like our boy. We have always been very strict with him because if you give him an inch he takes days to bring back. All the same things you've said. He does very well at school though socially and academically. But his temper is foul. He controls it pretty well on his own now (he is 9) but he still had his moments of pushing the limits.
There is nothing wrong with our son. Just a hot head who needs more guidance than the others (a few girls in our family) he is a very good kid.
As tiring and annoying as it can be there isn't a name or disorder that will change how he is. Just have to control the situation as best you can.
My step son (7) is like that. All I can suggest is making sure you stay firm with your boundaries. And in regards to school, mine was struggling but then he got a new teacher and has come along heaps. Maybe see what happens when he goes back to school this year
I could have written this myself sound exactly like Mr 6. We have decided to try removing as much artificial colours ect from his diet in the new year to see if that will help any.
Gosh, it's so hard to know isn't it? We have a son who is more emotional/moody than our other kids, yet not to the point of us thinking he needs assessing. I think that more consistency is required by myself & hubby in our case. We are also looking at foods. There are lots of additives, preservatives & chemicals in foods that have been linked to different behaviours. We are slowly reverting back to making a lot of foods from scratch, which does require time & forward planning (which is why it is a slow process for us lol). If you read "The Chemical Maze" or "Hard to Swallow", they will give you an insight into it. We are also reducing our sugar intake. We think it is making a difference so far, and he is also outgrowing some childhood sulkiness (he is 11). I'm sure you will be offered many differing opinions and advice & I hope there is a reply that resonates with you. This is what we are trying, but it doesn't mean you have to try it. I just wanted to pipe up as moral support. My advice for you is to go with your gut feeling. If you want to get his assessed, start with your GP, who would be able to refer you onto someone appropriate. Best of luck, I hope your young chap settles down.
Hi, seeing a professional is not always about getting a diagnosis for your child, professionals are also there to help with parenting styles and reworking techniques to assist with parents handling of a child who's behavior can be difficult. They are also helpful in being non judgemental when parents want to vent.........there are a number of different parenting strategies that can help with defiant boys.
Good luck (mum to 5 boys)
Hi, seeing a professional is not always about getting a diagnosis for your child, professionals are also there to help with parenting styles and reworking techniques to assist with parents handling of a child who's behavior can be difficult. They are also helpful in being non judgemental when parents want to vent.........there are a number of different parenting strategies that can help with defiant boys.
Good luck (mum to 5 boys)
Thanks all, I am not wanting a label but his behaviours are not acceptable and I am fiercely consistent with reaction and disapline. He just doesn't care, he is also immature ad carries on worse than my 5yo some days. I am frustrated by the whole thing. I can't even take him to his room by his arm as he is 135cm tall and 35kgs. It's just tough, hearing people say it's normal makes me feel better that it's just the challenges of raising kids. Diet isn't an issue as I am gluten free and am a bit of a health nut. Thanks for the feed back