Help me Mammas! I'm losing my mind! I feel so out of control and anxious. I'm the poster who wrote in saying I had an abnormal papsmear and a colposcopy which confirmed CIN 3 high grade precancerous cells on my cervix. Last week I had the surgery to have them removed. The whole few months of waiting for results and for surgery left me, an already medicated for anxiety person, even more anxious than I am usually. In the months that I had to wait for my results and surgery, my little brother had a biopsy which turned out to be squamous cell changes but precancerous (thank God) and my father in law was diagnosed with skin cancer for the second time in his life, and just recently had a second spot removed. I feel like it's everywhere, it's deadly and it scares the living crap out of me! Now it's all finally over I thought the weight would have lifted off my shoulders. How wrong I was. Now, every little thing that doesn't seem normal, whether it be a fever, a bruise, a blood nose, a swollen gland, you name it, has me convinced it's cancer! Just yesterday I went to the doctors because of a pigmentation I developed on my arms. I google doctored and the rash looked similar to the one a person with leukaemia may get. Turns out it's something completely different that actually runs in my family. My son had three blood noses, the first was really bad, during the night, for three nights in a row. Then today he hit his knee and it bruised quite easily. Those are also signs of leukaemia, yet it's probably, more than likely nothing at all and a big fat coincidence, yet I'm racking my brain wondering what if. The moment I start to forget about my fears, suddenly my mind turns back to 'what if it IS cancer?' I can't take if anymore. I spoke to the doctor about it today and he told me that after having a recent scare, it's not uncommon for high anxieties over cancer, but surely I can't keep living like this?! I need counselling or something, I'm already medicated for anxiety as it is! I don't want to live fearing my son or loved ones, or even myself has cancer, because this way of thinking is so unhealthy and I know it. I'm so paranoid and it's taking over my happiness. What are some ways other than the obvious that I can control this and has anyone else had this level of an unhealthy fear before?
1 Replies
Book a double appt with ur GP and ask for a mental health care plan or an ATAPS. they r subsidised or free visits to psychologists. The GP will ask u heaps of questions and get u to fill out questionnaires that's why u need a double appt. That appt will also be bulk billed, good luck. I had a cin 3 about 7 years ago, smoked for another 4 years and still have had clear Pap tests.