Hello I have teenagers ages 13 and 16 that were home when me and my partner had an argument. He vented to his friend and she phoned and said I made small cut on his hand which the police saw when they checked on us . But the cuts were from his work the night before. They asked my teens dates of births and my phone number they left with no charges being made will they call children’s aid . If so will I lose my kids .The police came to check at 3 am wednesday
19 Replies
Please rewrite, so we can understand.
I've never been involved with the police or had them called due to an argument. However, I think, don't know, thst it's a long process to remove children from their parents. I think that many chances are given and it's something that is not done lightly. Unless there was something significant, that would involve serious assault charges, significant danger to the kids, I would highly doubt your children will be removed. They may touch base, maybe visit to see kids are well cared for, but I can't imagine with one incident, your children being removed. If you are in a volatile relationship, maybe this is your wake up call.
I would sign up for an anger management course or see a therapist to work on emotional regulation. If you can demonstrate remorse and try to show you are trying, then that may go in your favour.
Its more likely that they may request that you do this anyway, not immediately remove your kids. It's based off someone who did not even witness it so difficult to prove. They try to help parents improve in the first instance unless they believe children are at immediate risk.
So he lied and said you cut him but you’re saying you didn’t?
The main thing you’re missing here is that the police were called on you. That’s not normal. It’s not ok. Bickering over the points of who’s right or wrong is a red flag to me, you should be mortified that your relationship is at this point and seriously considering the big picture, not how to keep your children in that house with you both.
DV in front of children has to be reported, so yes they will report it to children's services. However, its not nearly as scary as it sounds. They may not even do anything if the fight was minor and other things were ok like food, house etc. If they do contact you it will be to help you, it could be a blessing in disguise as they have resources that can really help you. The very last thing they do is take children away, it has to be really bad for that to happen.
My disgusting aboriginal son beats his misso up around their young 4 kids constantly but because she won't give him up to Police, they refuse to act and so does child protection and their kids - my grandkids- are under 10, and no one is allowed to do a damn thing. I think there's so much more to your story, you both sound toxic and it must be extremely serious if the cops have gotten involved over a cut. This pisses me off no end when I can't do a single thing about my own low life adult son and his family but yet one call over a cut and they're all over your case. Somethings not adding.
The police can't do much unless she wants to press charges. Child protection are probably building a case until there's enough there to intervene. Is your son getting help for himself? Does his partner have somewhere safe to go with the kids if she wanted? You don't sound very supportive when its probably the childhood you provided that produced the disgusting son you have today.
Just look here, Lady.. I have six children. He's the only one who turned out violent. He was raised exactly like his siblings, he's32 years old , I'm sick of being supportive. I have 5 other kids that need me too, you know nothing about how his father and i raised them. They are all wonderful members of society with jobs and a loving family in us all. One, unfortunately turned out violent he's an animal murderer and an abusing junkie. Tell me now hero, would you care to take him in under your wing?
No matter how often child protection get told, they have done nothing . It's been ten years . Building a ten year case you reckon? Yeah righto. You know nothing. I never asked for your misinformed opinion.
The police can be called to any domestic, the neighbours called the cops on my teenagers for playing fortnite too enthusiastically. They would have came, did a welfare check, sussed out what injuries there were, asked if they wanted to press charges, might have put a temporary order on them then off they went. Would be the same process when they go to your sons.
I call bs, what mother refers to her child as her "aboriginal' son?
You'd be surprised. My father in law is the most openly racist person I've ever met, despite being married to an aboriginal woman who gave birth to his aboriginal children.
Gosh, how fcked up would the kids be, growing up being taught by their dad to be ashamed of who they are. That they are inherently bad because of the colour of their skin. When people expect the worse from you, you usually give to them, talk about a self fulfilling prophecy.
It's people like you who jump up and down not liking to hear nationality, race etc .. which is why no one is allowed to say the race of anyone due to someone just like you getting offended . I'm his aboriginal mum, is that offensive to you too?
It's odd.
No one says their Australian child or white child.
I have a mixed race child, again, just my child, not my half this, half that child.
Im not sure why you would say "disgusting aboriginal son"? It sounds like you're saying that's a reason why he's abusive? I know plenty of aboriginal people in the town I live in and none of them would refer to their own kids like that. Its a weird thing to say. I don't believe you are aboriginal at all but I do believe your son is. Having other kids that turned out ok means nothing, siblings can have different traumas, different experiences, different conditions and be treated very differently to make them very different people. Have you reported them? Have you offered the partner somewhere to stay?
You're not going to lose your kids after one incident.
You should take this as a wake up call though!
My kids are mates with the teens next door to us, they live in an extremely volatile environment and I'm talking not a day goes by where someone in that house isn't screaming the place down.
I can see the damage it's doing plain as day it's unfathomableto me that their parents are so blind to it!
Those poor kids are jumpy and on edge constantly - when they're at my house you can tell that they arent used to calm. They struggle with their mental health and their own emotional regulation. Their self esteem is non existent and they don't trust adults.
And I'm sure that's just the tip of the iceberg!!
So, just some food for thought for you...
DV is reported to child protection especially if children witness it.
If they do feel that there's immediate threat to their wellbeing, they will get CPS to come collect them.
You probably won't lose your kids over this one incident (unless there's more that you haven't said) - but repeat incidents, maybe.
If you fight so badly that someone calls police & you're accused if wounding him with a weapon - break up.
This is a DV relationship and you're allowing your children to be exposed to it.
Learn from this & use it as a wake up call - you guys are just not meant to be together. End it now before it escalates (because it ALWAYS DOES) and you lose everything.
I think it’s quite clear.
She (X) has two teenaged children. They are aged 13 and 16. She and her partner (Y) had an argument on Tuesday night/Wednesday morning. Y “vented” about the argument to his female friend who phoned the police and claimed that X was responsible for a small cut on Y’s hand. That was untrue. The cut was sustained at Y’s workplace the night before the argument.
The police attended the residence and questioned the parties. During the course of that questioning, the police noted down the dates of birth of the children and X’s telephone number.
X is asking us whether:
1. the police are likely to call social services regarding the incident; and
2. if they do call social services, whether X is likely to lose custody of her children.
OP this sounds like a distressing situation for you and it is not helped by your partner involving his friend. I doubt that social services will be involved and, if they are, I doubt that you will lose custody of your children as a result of this incident. That assumes that there is no other history of domestic or other violence and that everything you have told us is reflected in the police report.
I do suggest, as others have here, that you consider whether this is a healthy situation for you and your children: I wish you all the best x