I want another baby. My only child and daughter, is 8yo. My partner has 2 from a previous marrage and they live with us. I love them all very much.
I never wanted more kids. But over the past say, 18months, I've gotten so dam clucky. I did bring it up about 6 months a go in passing to my partner and he laughed it off.
Well, I'm about to bring up the subject again. I can't get past this feeling and it's getting stronger every day. I k ow he's going to say no. He's 47, I'm 38. When he says no, how do I move on. I walked into this relationship knowing he only wanted one more child which we share
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Honestly, babysit someone's 2 year old for an entire day and you will change your mind. We forget how hard and horrible they are and only remember the good. I babysit a 2 year old and I have no idea how I managed 3 of these once upon a time. It's brought back some memories! Don't do it, you'll be a 40 plus mum of an active young child, its hard work and is very restricting. Your partner may not be that helpful if you need to talk him into it so you will be doing it by yourself.
I disagree that you should just simply not do it because of your age. Having a baby is hella hard work at any age, and 38 isn’t that old, geez! But in saying that, I agree to really think through the practical hardship of having a baby to decide whether you really want another child, or just the idea and cluckiness has hit you. If you really do like the idea, then don’t let him laugh it off. The least he can do is to understand you have thought this through and the feeling remains, and to seriously think about it.
The least he can do? He made it clear to her at the start he doesn't need to think about it all.
Being in your 40s with young kids is definitely old, sugar coat it as much as you like. I'm in my 40's and am not as fit as I was 20 years ago. Even if you start off very fit pregnancy hits you like a tonne of bricks then a baby, sleepless nights, a lot of lifting, bending and carrying. Then a toddler that is heavier and more mobile. Add to all that the germs that get shared from daycare and getting knocked down. Age is a factor when deciding to have a child.
Yes, the least he can do is listen without shrugging it off with a joke
I didn’t sugar coat it, anywhere. Age is a factor, it is not, at age 38, a definitive reason that it should not be done, that’s ridiculous.
Should age be a factor at 47? Because that's how old he is.
Nobody can tell anybody else that they should not have a baby based solely on their age, no.
I think mother nature disagrees with you there lol
Jesus Christ lady, give it a rest, you are not Mother Nature
Im thinking beyond pregnancy, having a baby and toddler, then a school aged child that needs to go here there and everywhere, then a teenager with hormones and drama. I think its OK if you don't already have a child, some people start their families late and that's their choice. But as someone that had my kids in my 20's it was exhausting even for me at that age and I was always a healthy weight and exercised. I just couldn't do it now thinking the next 20 years you're doing it all over again. She may only be 38 right now but if they did decide to have another it could be early 40's before she has it. You are also forgetting Dad is nearly 50, does he want to go through all that again for the rest of his life possibly? I wouldn't.
I’m not forgetting anything. I gave this lady advice she asked for, to have the conversation with her partner. No one else can make their decision. Go and make your own post, you have an idea for yourself but you need to realise that doesn’t make it the only acceptable answer.
i'm 45, i feel for your partner, would never want a child at this age.
I think shifting focus. If you fell pregnant, it would be a high risk pregnancy due to your age. This would potentially put not only your unborn babies life at risk but also your own. Speaking from someone who has lost someone very close to me. Please think about how important you are to your family. Not saying women should not fall pregnant at this age but please be aware of the risks.
That aside, I have had those feelings too. The reality is different, once we have that baby and the sleepless nights, teething, nappies, crying kick in, we tend to wake up quickly and rather harshly.
So my focus now is love the ones I have. One day I will be the grandmother that gets to completely enjoy them and hand them back haha. That will come around quicker than you realise. Enjoy the brief phase of being able to date and travel before helping out with babies again 💕
I seen something yesterday, you don’t want another baby you want your baby to be a baby again.
Maybe think about that.
And I’m sorry a no outweighs a yes, you need to respect his choice.