How do I move on from my cheating ex husband when I still love him?
He cheated for 12 months until I discovered it. Lied continuously until I saw his deleted conversations and is still gaslighting me by saying I misread everything, nothing physical happened, it was all a joke, he never wanted to be with her, if he did he would by now, he had plenty of opportunity to meet up, but didn’t (they were making plans to see each other and probably did. I just saw the last 30 days of the message history). Even now he won’t call it an affair (it most definitely was from what I read). He says he’s “done me wrong” but won’t use the affair/cheating words.
How do I turn my heart off? What’s your best advice for getting over someone (which doesn’t involve men!). And how did you manage to live under the same roof until the house was sold? How do I fund my divorce? I have very little saved, but don’t qualify for legal aid.
6 Replies
You have to go no contact, it’s the only way to get over someone. And get out there and move on physically. Then you’ll be much less inclined to waste your time listening to his bs.
Also, when he’s speaking, remind yourself that he is telling you to your face that he’s totally fine with treating you the way he has and that’s what he’s offering you, to your face, then respond appropriately. Let the man know you’re worth so much more than he is offering.
No contact. Get him out! Block him and sort the house out. Stop talking to him. Nothing he can say or do will change the scumbag that he is. Just more lies.
You get one previous life! You need to live the life that you deserve free of him.
Get him out of your house and get the house sorted ASAP or you go stay somewhere just get away from him.
Don’t ask him anything, don’t talk to him nothing. Block block block!
Precious life
How? Time.
Tomorrow will come and you'll look back without a single fuck given.
Firstly I am so sorry this happened to you. I have been through this scenario.
Every time you think of him in a loving way think about those text messages
It is painful and is painful for a very long time. While you are seeing him everyday the healing will be longer.
In my case I didnt request as much super as I could have, as instead he offered to pay for legal fees. As I didnt have much money this worked for me
Betrayal is a terrible feeling but it gets better
If you don’t have kids you cut him out completely once the house is saved. Otherwise, you be polite for the kids and make small obtainable goals. Go on a solo trip somewhere, join a gym or a hobby group, seek therapy. Do all the things for you. It’s not about him anymore it’s about you and healing you.