Is she a narsitistic personality or just a horrible person. Together for 15 years, 15 and 16 year old children. Throughout our relationship she has cheated 3/4 times that I know of, claims she was sorry but wouldn’t seek COunselling, whenever I wanted to talk about it and get some answers I would be shut down and wasn’t allowed to talk about it. I had so many unresolved answers/issues stemming from this but I felt like I couldn’t raise them and discuss my feelings.
I was at fault for the affairs for not being available to her as often as she would like. I already do most things for the children, she is busy at social events or at work, I found her to have no empathy, no remorse, cold, distant, especially towards the end of the relationship. She has huge ego, graniosis, likes to be centre of attention, it’s all about her. She wasn’t really verbally abusive or aggressive in nature but I felt undermined and unable to express my true emotions
She had another women lined up and is now moved in with her. I found she was talking to all these women that she had saved in her phone with alias names, Snapchat/Insta and now discovered a new app that is designed to hide messages/FaceTimes etc. it’s
Like a double life.
She has totally mislead us, I don’t have any feelings for her at all anymore the lies are just copious, the deception and lack of respect is horrendous, I was always gaslighted, manipulated and it’s only now that I am seeing all of this.
Am I over reacting or this person is narsitistic or at the bare minimum has major toxic traits
I just want to know so I can prepare and recognise these signs in future relationships
5 Replies
Screw that! Who cares if she is clinically anything... she cheated! Once is 99% likely to be unforgivable.... but she has cheated repeatedly! You deserve better!
The label doesn’t matter one little bit. What matters now is rebuilding your life.
She's an awful person who cheated on you repeatedly, treated you like shit and left you for another woman.
Forget the labels, forget her.
Get yourself some counselling, stay single until you know who you are and what you're worth, make a happy life for yourself and the kids, and then go find a woman who will treat you properly.
I know you're trying to figure out things but you're going to make this turn into a painful rabbit Warren of a maze that will continue to wrap you around until you loose it.
I'd see or rather get some counselling for yourself, 100% without a doubt.
That person doesn't care that you care or have ever cared or whatever. It's all about them filling up their own bucket of self gratification and poor self awareness.
Labels won't help you and can be counter productive if they decide to play the victim in turn victimising you by blame games etc.
Drop and kick the footy as far away as possible.
Your kids will probably thankyou for the respite. Get them counselling too.
Very narcissistic, textbook narcissist
behaviour. But the label in the end doesn't matter she has treated you like complete shit.
I suggest joining some online narcissistic recovery support groups. It helped me to see that I wasn't insane or alone.