I am so hurt and I just don't know if I can pull through this or not.
A few weeks ago, my fiance borrowed my old phone for a couple of days because his was broken and he needed to get a new one.
Unfortunately for him, he didn't log out of his email, and notifications came up for Onlyfans and escorts site Locanto.
I stupidly dug deeper, and found out he was subscribed to a few women on Onlyfans (he didn't interact with them from what I could see), and was also following a few prostitutes on Locanto.
Once again, I saw absolutely no evidence of interacting.
I ended up confronting him, and he said he was only looking at pictures, and even through he is crazy sorry, he said I wasn't giving him enough affection/attention/initiating sex etc.
Hes cried, he's begged forgiveness etc.
I'm borderline obsessed with looking at his search history and email, I'm horrified, as I haven't been this crazy before.
He has now said he wants to set a date to finally get married, and has deleted all the suspicious accounts (believe me, I checked).
But I can't get it out of my head that he will just open another email account and keep going.
I work nights, and it makes me feel sick going to work at the moment because of all the online stuff he's been doing.
I work nights, he works days, we barely see each other.
If it was just straight porn I would be fine, but its prostitutes.
I'm so frustrated because I've never said no to him, I just can't understand why it's appealing to masturbate to strangers on the internet when he has me laying right beside him (when I'm not at work).
We have a 4 year old together, so it's not as easy as leaving.
I just don't know what to do.
Fiances online activity really upsets me
Fiances online activity really upsets me
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage
4 Replies
Now is not the time to be setting a date for a wedding. That’s an asshole demand, right there.
He needs to be working hard to proving that he’s worth even staying with and that’s going to take some time, he may never earn your trust back.
Right now he needs to give you time and not applying pressure for you to get over it. Sweeping this issue under the rug is not the way to go.
He is starting to get frustrated whenever I bring it up or get upset over it.
I can't control when my emotions run wild and I think what if he actually wants to cheat
Having been cheated on, I would boot any man that I found in this position. It just doesn’t happen to good men. And the ‘you’re not giving me enough sex/attention’ excuse would seal the deal. It’s what he’ll say after he’s caught as well. He’s sorry, he loves you, but…
When you have children involved it is more important to choose what you put up with, choose what bed you’re making carefully. A wedding won’t change him, it just makes you trapped deeper.
This is the point in your relationship when he is most besotted with you. If he's browsing the menu for other women now, it isn't going to improve over time. I'd be separating personally. I'm happily married 15 years and don't agree with divorce in most circumstances.... but having a happy marriage is dependent on marrying someone that loves and respects you in the first place. Clearly he doesn't.