Partner and I moved in together after 8 months together. Prior to this we did so much together without our kids. Mine are over every 2nd week and one of his live with us fulltime and the other every second weekend.
I still expect a little alone time with just he and I and when I suggested this he said “things are different now” and “the kids need to be with us”.
Am I being unfair with expecting some time with just the two of us only? I feel like we have become distant. I get the kids come first but surely there can be time for just us?
Time with Partner
Time with Partner
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage
9 Replies
You've jumped the gun a little too fast.
Move one of you back out and go back to what it was for another year at least. Discuss things like this prior to moving in again.
8 months wow, how dumb.
Not always, I'm 9 years in with a fast move in. Happy and United
That's called luck but still dumb. Try being the kid that had a new step parent at least once a year due to both parents deciding every one they meet is their forever love. If I ever break up with my husband it will take me years to decide to live with another man and if he had his own kids I probably would stay living apart. Should be a law against living with someone too soon when you have kids. Its how a lot of women end up in DV relationships or expose their kids to abusers.
I don't think you should judge unless you've been in that situation. It's like saying if I ever lose a limb I'll definitely use a prosthesis. You don't know unless you are in that situation
I've been the kid in that situation and watched many people make the same mistake, that's enough for me to know what I would do.
If you don't your quality time first every now and then, you will begin to resent each other. I'd organise for every second weekend to be child free, if you can organise a weekend swap for contacts. Then once a fortnight it's just the two of U.
What do they do with the child they have full time?
Every second weekend is not possible, but the occasional weekend away is. Movie night at home is. Babysitter for a date night. Plan a beach walk or sunset stroll. If the kids young they can ride and if older stay home.