Hi all
Looking for some suggestions. My 10 yr old girl has generalized anxiety and sees a therapist for the various anxieties she is dealing with at any one time.
One big one currently is she isn’t able to sleep away from us (parents). She starts to panic when it gets dark and calls us to pick her up if at a sleepover. The other child gets upset because the night is ruined and my child feels horrible because she can’t be ‘normal’.
My child has never been able to attend camp because of this sleeping away from parents anxiety. Has anyone experienced this and found anything that has helped?
Just to clarify this is different from being homesick. It’s a the anxiety presenting and she has little control over it. She’s desperate to go to camp, she doesn’t want to miss out. But feels she can’t sleep away from us.
It’s not an option for us to attend camp with her or stay nearby and pick her up each night.
Appreciate your suggestions!
10 Replies
Mine has anxiety as well, she hate sleepovers but loves the idea of them. It’s just getting the anxiety under control, and having good experiences. She now goes for sleepovers with friends (she still has accidents in the night or freak outs, often wets the bed or her pants) but the trusted adults there help her and cuddle her and each time she is learning that she can. She went to camp last year. She was hugely anxious about ‘what if’s’ but she had a blast. I set her up and about 70% sure she would. If your daughter still cries and calls you to come home from sleepovers, then I wouldn’t send her. You could make that her goal - when she can stay overnight at a friends, she can go to camp.
Thank you for sharing and for your suggestions x
They often need parent volunteers for camp. I’d volunteer. She gets to go, and has the support she needs.
Thanks for your reply! I did that last year and she left her cabin each night and slept in my cabin with me. There are some kids this year that have decided they don’t like her anymore and we are afraid if that happened again she would be made fun of for being a baby. It will be too tempting for her to come to my cabin if I’m there.
I’d talk to her therapist about a structured plan, to work towards sleep overs.
She won’t be ready for this camp, but will help prep her for the future.
Personally I’d start with social stories, and plans for her to sleep over at a trusted family members house. Perhaps with some melatonin to aid sleep.
I’d stay with her until she is asleep and then pick her up in the morning. When she is consistently able to do that, I’d get a family member to take over the bed time routine while you are in the other room etc.
I’d discuss this all with her therapist about it first though.
Thank you so much, I really appreciate your suggestions. Some great tips that I will discuss with her therapist. x
You could try and send her with a teddy and ask a close friend to be with her. My son is really bad also and has attended one camp at age 11 for 2 nights, he wanted us to pick him up but we didn’t. He was fine. He didn’t like it but he was fine, he has no choice. The next camp came and he didn’t go.
Thank you x
I would probably skip camp this year. In preparation for the next camp, do you have family that live nearby? Can she have sleepovers with grandparents, aunts or uncles to get her used to sleeping away from you. Or perhaps to start even slower, date night for you and dad with someone she knows and trusts at home, with you getting home after she’s in bed. When she’s confident with that, have a night away and someone else stay at the house with her so she’s still in her own bed. Build up to her having a sleepover at that person’s house.
Thank you for your suggestions x