Dear IM
I'm feeling so down about my self. My self esteem has hit an all time low. I'm usually a confident person who couldn't care less about what someone thinks about me. I've just had a beautiful baby (who was 10p @birth) 5months ago and tbh I haven't worked on my postpartum body as it's the last thing on my mind.Anyway,Yesturday I was treated to a full body massage, I had been dreaming about it all week as I couldn't wait to be pampered. I went for the massage an she started on my back first.. 2mins into it whilst massaging me she said " you need to start exercising and going for walks with bubs to loose weight because U don't want to give hubby an excuse to look else where"! Omg I wanted to jump off that table so fast 😠who says that?? I continued with the massage ( now kicking myself for not saying anything) & awkwardly agreeing. I now feel like shit and unattractive even with my hubby reassuring me I'm beautiful ECT . Hubby wants to lay a complaint but I don't want him to as I'm just so embarrassed about the whole thing ad just want to forget the whole experience. Have any of you had this happen to U? What would you do? I will get over this but for now I just loathe my whole body. Thanks for reading IMs PS I'm also getting another massage from someone else this w.e so hopefully that cheers me up.
20 Replies
Absolutely complain, and write a review! You have no reason to be embarrassed. The person who did the massage should be embarrassed. If she works for a business they will want to know so she doesn’t destroy the business.
Omg your husband is right. If anything, think about how she’s ruined your massage - and your week, with her totally rude, inappropriate, unprofessional comment, and then save others. The manager should give you another, ACTUALLY relaxing massage too!!
Omg wtf?! That's disgusting of her to say. Absolutely complain
Mate, I had a 7lb baby almost 25 years ago and haven't worked on my postpartum body. You have noone to answer to.
Maybe she's an airhead that regularly sticks her foot in her mouth. Maybe she realised as she said it that it was stupid and didn't know what to do. Maybe she still thinks there's nothing wrong with what she said.
Regardless.
Yes you make a complaint. What she said was hurtful and rude, she absolutely needs to apologise and learn to shut up and do her job from now on. You being "that woman" now (ie, that woman that complained) means the next woman will be saved from her thoughtless tongue.
Sorry, i laughed at the start of your post, i love it. I’m 9 years PP and while i have lost weight, it hasn’t been intentional 😂
16 years PP. I haven't had time to do any work on the bod yet.
She body shamed you and insulted the integrity of your husband in one fell swoop. That's the absolute height of unprofessionalism!
Make a complaint, you should be treated with nothing less than respect and dignity whilst having a massage not having unsolicited digs being made about your weight.
Also, imagine how many other clients this has happened to. Not everyone would be strong enough to simply shake it off.
Absolutely make a complaint, that is disgusting and disrespectful behaviour. This person needs a lesson on respect or they need to be fired.
Absolutely! Tell the company & masseuse that's unacceptable behaviour & how it ruined the massage & how it made you feel & you only stayed out of shock & embarrassment. While being massaged we're in a vulnerable position already.
When you complain, write down exactly what you want to say beforehand & what you want to happen. Refund & face to face apology from masseuse to start. If you are unsatisfied with the result then leave bad reviews online.
Take it from personal experience - if you don't confront & resolve it you won't move on. It'll pop back into your head every time you hear or see the word 'massage' & you'll be upset you never got to tell that person it wasn't acceptable.
Get your new massage & enjoy it!
I'm gobsmacked!!
Was it completely unprompted? Or were you guys chatting about babies/weight loss etc or did she just come out with that pearler??
Do whatever you feel is right for you as far as complaining but please please know that there is nothing at all wrong with you or your amazing body that just made a little human!
Was she foreign by any chance? Some cultures are like this, not in a mean way but an "I'm helping you" way which obviously here in Australia that's not helpful because we are moving away from that mindset. Although you would be surprised how many Australian women still think it's OK if a man cheats if the woman let herself go, like she brought it on herself. Just send an email to management so they are aware, there's no need to make it public if it's someone else's business. It's best to let them know what's happening and give them a chance to deal with their employee.
Yes complain!
Yes complain!
Yes most definitely lay a complaint. I can not believe someone would say this. What a disgusting bitch to say such a thing. Please complain so no one else goes through this. Tell them you will never be back again
I would have stopped the message, asked for management and asked for a refund and went somewhere else.
Your body grew a whole human for 9 months. You birthed a 10p baby only 5 months. You have no one to answer to about your body. No your husband and especially not that Ahole!
Please put in a complaint about her as the next new mum looking for self care may have PPD and comments like these may break her
If this person worked for me I would want to know . How would the business owner be able to fix anything if no one tells them. So unprofessional and probably projecting some of her own life BS onto her clients. Not good enough
Omg. Please give me the name of this place!! I'd looooove to give them a review!
Your priority is your baby and looking after you, not pleasing societies standards on beauty!!
Firstly your body has had to recover from a major event and I am confident you are beautiful just like your husband says! Secondly HOW DARE SHE! To comment on your body in such a vulnerable setting. In a setting that is supposed to be about comfort and self care. What a bitch. It’s unprofessional, rude and downright nasty. She not only insulted you, but your husband and your relationship. To insinuate that men stray because women don’t look good enough is beyond gross.
I understand why your husband is so mad. I’m steaming and I don’t know you. You and your husband brought life into the world. That is beautiful. You are beautiful. I really hope you have a fantastic experience at your next massage because you deserve it. You have nothing to be ashamed of but I do think she needs to be held accountable.
I would 100% complain
I would definitely complain. I would also love to know where NOT to go for a massage if you’re willing to do an update post with those details.