Hi Mum's
I have a very abusive 15yr old son he's always been verbally abusive since he became a teenager and his narcissistic dad usually says to just ignore the words coming out of his mouth as he's just going through some issues and to not take offense.
We have been separated for over 10 years and dad doesn't live in Australia and visits once a year, he isn't the nicest person so he's not much help there.
He also sends my son pocket money so cutting off allowance isn't an option and I'm just being too sensitive and overreacting.
But now my son physically pushed me in the back after a small bicker about who owns his phone and then proceeded to get right in my face threatening me that he could drop me in a second as he is much bigger than me.
I have since turned off Netflix and Stan and will not be paying for his next phone bill.
I did ask him to get the F... out of my house in the heat of the moment but he just said he wouldn't and he can break-in at any time so don't bother kicking him out.
He is also smoking dope now almost daily and I have noticed that the day after he's had a smoke his anger issues are more extreme.
My question is are there any services out there that help mums in this situation?
Do I just call the cops and will they come? Have any other mums dealt with this and what solutions do they offer.
Abusive son help me?
Abusive son help me?
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage
9 Replies
Sounds like he's starting to get withdrawals from pot. My ex was addicted to it and became really aggressive and angry when he couldn't get it. He needs to see a Dr but he needs to want to see one too. So yes, to get him to wake up I would be now calling the police whenever he hurts you, this will hopefully get him to realise that he needs to smarten up and get help. Tell his Dad what is going on and tell him you do not want him sending him money any more until he sorts his crap out. If he still sends money ask him to take his son to live with him.
Ring the police and put an avo on him if he touches you or threatens you. He needs a hard lesson in respect! What a shit. Do it now before he gets worse.
Ring 000 and tell them he is abusive and what ever he is doing at the time. He needs to be dealt with and don’t feel bad and don’t drop any charges they might put on him. He needs it.
He will only get worse so you need the police to intervene and help you deal with this and let him know you are serious and won’t put up with it.
Yes ring the police
My 15 year old son was behaving the same way and put a hole in the plasterboard. I called the police and he had to go to court. He’s been great ever since.
Well done mumma. That must have been hard but I think they need it to teach them from the start that is isn’t acceptable and it needs to be dealt with. Good for you, you taught your son a valuable lesson. He will thank you in years to come.
Hi, yes I've been there a year ago and it was HELL so I have all the sympathy in the world for you. Unfortunately I didn't find anyone who wanted to help me, I was just told to 'take him to counselling' which of course he wouldn't go to.
My son left our house after an argument and I didn't know where he was staying, he eventually came back after a few months and we are now working on getting his issues sorted out.
I know he is your son and you love him more than words but please don't be pushed around by him. It's your house and if he doesn't like the living arrangements he can seek out his own. He will soon realise there is no place like home.
I thought of calling the police a number of times but I didn't as I was fearful of the long term consequences for my son - however in hindsight It could have helped put a stop to it earlier.
Your son is obviously going through something right now and that's so hard for him, but not an excuse to be abusive or intimidating. He probably needs a more frequent positive role model than what his Dad is giving him, maybe encourage him to join a gym or boxing club?
You are doing a great job and keep hanging in there because every day he gets a little bit older and more mature and you will get through it
Kick this little shit out. He's dangerous. And he doesn't get to come back until he changes. 15 or not, violence should NEVER be tolerated . A hostel can take him in and provide him with all the resources he needs. Work with them to assist him while he's interimly out of the family home.