How to help my nearly 20 year old daughter.....
Long story, bare with me please.
My eldest daughter is nearly 20 and has just cut off all our family. She struggles with mental health and is trying to get help but she is isolating herself from everyone. She looses her temper many times a day for the silliest of reasons. I suffer anxiety and depression also but am medicated and doing well. As i live in another country to her i only have video contact. She has moved like 5 times this year alone between our friends and families places and they have all paid for her. She is not learning how to be an adult nor is she making any positive steps for herself. She has to postpone her dr app as she has no money. I feel she needs an inpatient service. Everything i say falls on deaf ears unless its what she wants to hear. She thinks about suicide daily but is too scared to do it. (thankfully) I just want her better.... How do i help her? i know the old saying you can lead a horse to water but can't make them drink, but surely there is somewhere out there that can help her. She is so lost in life, has issues with abandonment ect... any advice please????? I am so lost and heart broken for her and our family who love her dearly.
10 Replies
Inpatient facilities are usually private unless you are a danger to yourself and others. Beds in public inpatient are extremely hard to get into.
If she can’t afford a doctors appointment she can’t afford a private inpatient treatment program.
I’d offer to pay for her doctors appointments personally.
Can’t pay for someone who has a high likelihood of not going to appointments.
If she takes out top level Private insurance she may be able to get coverage for psychiatric care straight away (we have done this). You need to convince her though.
The kid can't even afford a doctor appointment, and you think she should take out PHI?! Jeez.
Is she entitled to medicare? Then gp would be free. If not, then inpatient service would be much much more expensive.
If not, and she has no support and no money, I would probably cut her off financially and ask all of your friends to do the same and encourage her to come home to you. That's not a good situation for her to be in.
Thanks genius. The monthly cost of PHI is way less than the cost of one psychiatrist appointment.
Wow, what a lovely person you are, speaking to strangers who are trying to assist you without anything in return, like that.
Not in Queensland but the mental health system in Australia is pathetic. It is really hard to get help for anyone especially if they have a condition that prohibits them from seeking help and actually physically seeing someone like severe depression and anxiety. You're on your own until they miraculously want to go. Or you can call an ambulance next time she threatens to kill herself which will force her to get initial help but then it's the same situation for crucial follow up care. And the ambulance/police/hospital can be quite traumatising for a younger person with mental health issues but that's how Australia thinks is best to deal with a suicidal young person. We went through this with my son. Good luck. Keep encouraging her to get help herself, unfortunately it's the only way.
She can present to emergency or call 000 for an ambulance and she'll go into mental health ward.
I don't know much about inpatient care but I was young lady who suffered abandonment issues, anxiety, depression, suicidal ideation and had a diagnosis of BPD.
I never went into inpatient but came close when I stopped eating and became sickly thin. I stopped eating because I didn't want to live anymore and was to scared to use other avenues to harm myself. That was 3 years ago.
Today I work as nurse, I still have issues with anxiety and depression, I always will but I handle them alot better now and have overcome so much in the last few years. I received alot of help through accessing mental healthcare plans through a gp (all bulk billed) at first I was very reluctant to go but somebody went with me to start with and eventually I started going on my own.
If your daughter is struggling with paying doctor bills and attending, is it possible you could go with her to a bulk bill surgery and get the ball rolling on a mental health care plan.... If it turns out that she does need further care then they can provide they will help find her find that care too.