Hi
I've just had a bombshell dropped on me.
I've been with my partner for 3 years, we both have kids to previous partners. We've been planning our future together, mostly buying a home together so we could grow old together.
He has been off for the last few weeks and this afternoon he tells me he can't see a future together. He no longer feels in love. He can't build a bond with my kids despite the amount of time we've been together, ( I have them full time).
My heart has been ripped from my chest. This man is the the light of my life. What am I supposed to do? Where do I go from here? How do I talk to our kids? When will the pain stop? Any advice on moving forward would help. I'm gutted.
4 Replies
I know this is heartbreaking but he has done the right thing instead of hanging around resenting your kids and making everyone's life a misery! I wish it would happen more to be honest.
Take time to grieve the relationship, let yourself cry. But not too long. Channel the energy into your relationship with your kids. Still save for a property and don't change your plans just because he's out of the picture.
Do not tell your kids what he said, don't put any blame or involvement on them whatsoever. Just tell them you both thought you were going to live together forever but you learnt that's not whats right for both of you and you're better off apart.
As much as it hurts he’s done you and your kids a kindness.
I couldn’t stay with someone who hadn’t bonded with my kids after 3 years and I wouldn’t want my kids to have to live with someone they hadn’t bonded with either.
Was it really a surprise?
Breakups always hurt though, just know you can handle this and there are good things coming. This just wasn’t the one, and better to know now before you bought the house.
I’m sorry you are going through this, but he did the right thing.
I couldn’t love someone who doesn’t see how special my kids are.
All you can do is take time to grieve and eventually find the person who will love you and your children and want a life with you!! You all deserve that💜