I feel I need to write this to reach out to others going through a rough patch in their marriage at the moment.
14 yrs into our marriage and we hit a major wall, I found out my husband had been unfaithfull for a few months. It was not a sexual relationship but a emotional affair.
How could he, yes things were strained but I hoping we could nip it on the butt.
We have 3 amazing young boys, a beautiful family. As a saying say's in the song "Love is War", Sometimes love is like a feather, sometimes a cannonball. But it's worth fighting for.
We made a oath to each other, to honour and respect.
When he made the choice to cheat on me, he also cheated on his family.
I was deeply hurt by his deception but still loved him so dearly.
We had been through a lot together. We both suffered depression at different times in our relationship frm outside pressures and were a tower of support to each other.
We also had a lot good times, really good times and I was not ready to clock out of this marriage.
We both took responsibility of our roles in our struggles in our marriage which turned out to be an amazing turning point in our marriage.
After all choosing to love each other is the miracle of a marriage, a every lasting relationship. We were both on the same team wanting the same thing.
I'm so grateful that we didn't give up on each other. Staying together doesn't happen by accident, and neither does a happy marriage. We had to make a dedicated decision to love other, fight for each other, respect each other and hold onto each other.
When two people really care for each other they will always look for a way to make it work, no matter how hard it is.
That terreble day when I found out my husband was cheating was 3 years ago today. Today I reflect and am yelling from the top of my lungs 'I AM SO PROUD OF US". It took forgiveness and hardwork and not wanting to walk away when things get hard because today we are FANTASTIC, HAPPY and MADLY IN-LOVE.
I wish you all out there struggling at the moment a wonderful outcome like mine xx
6 Replies
What a wonderful outcome. Thank you for sharing!
That is truly wonderful
I too have been in your shoes with my partner having an emotional affair 16 years into the relationship and its almost 3 years later for us also. It was hard work BOTH of taking some responsibility into the things that happened but im glad we did because it has made us stronger
This is us too, emotional affair on his behalf, I remember the pain but it has eased somewhat. Sometimes and somethings make your mind wander. But overall it’s been tough but worthwhile.
Good on you for trying and working through this instead of just walking away (as most people probably told you to do)
I just wanted to reach out and say thank you for sharing your story. I really needed to read this. I am going through this situation right now. I am 3 months from finding out my husband was having an emotional affair with a coworker. We have been married 10 years, together for over 13 and have 4 beautiful young children. I love him more than anything but it has been such a struggle so far. Ive reached out for advise on how to move forward and I’ve been told to throw it in and run away. So this perspective is so needed for others in this position. This might seem quite strange but I haven’t come across anybody in the same situation that has stayed and come out happy and in love together after all this. Is there any chance you would be willing to chat with me. I would really appreciate any advise and just to hear a success story.
I'm posting this anonymous as there's alot of family and friends who don't know this and they areonthis page. I had an emotional affair with a guy who wasn't my husband for almost 2 years, my husband and I were having massive problems and I turned to someone else instead of working it out with him at the time. It's now been just over a year and a half since I sat him down and told him what had been going on and it still hurts him even now. But we both admitted we were to blame for what happened, he was working away drinking extensively and wasn't present in our marriage for almost 3 years. While I was depressed, gaming 8 to 10 hours a day and resented the fact that I was basically raising our children solo as he was hardly ever home and when he was he was either drinking or catching up with friends and I was alone alot. I turned to the other guy as a way of coping and spent nearly all day talking or msging him online. We have since opened up alot more, he changed jobs and we try and spend more time together or as a family, the trust isn't fully back and probably never will be but we are both willing to work on our marriage as we love each other soo much and don't want to live without each other. It's tough but if your willing to try and make it work it can be done and I'm even more in love with my husband now than I've ever been