Hi fellow IM's.
Needing some advice about my 8 (nearly 9) year old son. Sorry, it's a bit long...
Bit of background. He has ADHD (on Ritalin) his father and I are divorced and have both re partnered.
Problem that I'm having with my son is that he is stealing food and lying about it. He's taking chocolates, snacks, cereal from the pantry, and then denies and lies about it! He's taking the food in the mornings, and hiding the wrappers/rubbish in his bedroom.
I removed all sweets from the house, so there wasn't temptation for him, so instead, he stole cooking chocolate and ate that.
I've tried locking the pantry, punishment, friendly chats, I just don't know what else to do! I've taken away toys, no tv, no 'technology time'. Nothing is working. It's gotten to the stage now where he is still doing it and stashing the rubbish under his bed. So, now I've taken his bed, and his mattress is just on the floor.
His father and I are on the same page with this, we both want it sorted because he does it at his fathers house too. We have the same punishments at each house.
Any suggestions would be very helpful!!! Please no nasty comments, I'm at my wits end and just have absolutely no idea what to do next and where to go from here!
8 Replies
This is a really strong craving he has. Have you tried letting him have a small amount if chocolate each day. It is sounding like he wanting some control over his food choices. Is he on a restricted diet, as kids I've worked with in the past who are on sugar free diets or similar I've worked with in the past have done this. Think about it if someone tells you you are never to have something you just want it more! I've seen kids take food out of rubbish bins in desperation :( What would happen if he asked for chocolate or similar, would the answer in your child's mind always be NO? Just a collection of thoughts came to mind
Hi there. He does have sugar in his daily diet, so I don't think it's the cravings that are getting to him, he's also not only stealing chocolate. If he asks for food, I tell him to have fruit or a healthy option first, then he can have a small treat afterwards, so I'm not saying no straight up or all the time. I'll try with more choice and control for him and see if that helps any. Thank you! :).
Hope you find the answers it was just some thoughts from past experiences :)
I agree its an issue with the food craving / control / choice / independence, not lying & stealing. I would be mindful of punishing eating habits it could turn into a more serious issue when its a psychological problem, not behavioural.
I wonder if youve put healthier options (but fun/treatlike) there for him to choose.or maybe once or twice. Day make something together like a dessert with ( frozen/ fresh) yoghurt, fruit, honey, nuts, shaved chocolate. Etc etc, so he is having it but spending more time considering & creating than just scoffing instant junk & hiding the evidence. Maybe you could make a healthier chocolate treat, like caro rice bubbles or balls or choc moulds & he could have a box in the fridge, but when he feels like it, he asks you & you make a drink of milk or water & sit together & eat them guilt free then put them away.
Thanks for your reply. I'm wondering how it could be a food craving though? He's not only going for chocolates (although that is the main food item), he's also taking packets of rice cracker snacks and lunchbox snacks that I keep in a box in the cupboard. And he has dessert a couple of times a week too, he'll have frozen yoghurt with berries, ice cream with ice magic, things like that. Last night he had ice cream and strawberries for dessert, and this morning he'd stolen cooking chocolate. He has sugar in his daily food so I'm just wondering if it's not a food craving and a behaviour issue? Hope that makes sense.
Yeah it does. It could be an insatiable craving if he is on meds, but as you said you dont think so, could it be a sensory thing where he enjoys feeling food in his mouth? Is he worried about his next meal ( doesnt sound like it though) is it too long between meals for him, does he have choice. Or is it non- food related & this is his new development in independence & the kitchen and food is something hes found that he can control ( I dont think so because hes actually eating all the food). I think trying to find the reason for the behaviour will help you a lot. Have you seen the gp? That would be my next stop. Hopefully some mums on here will have been there & know something to help :)
Thank you! You've given me some good ideas and tips, and I'll take him to the our family dr as well. Thank you for your help! Very much appreciated!!!
Cool, good luck x